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Writing Better Character Descriptions
We writers have a particularly tough job: bringing nonexistent people (our characters) to life in our readers’ imaginations. While it’s never easy, we usually accomplish this magic by writing each character with two qualities in mind:
1) Their personality
2) Their physical appearance
Personality is usually expressed through characterization, and appearance through physical description. Admittedly, that doesn't sound so complicated.
But there are two things I’ll suggest today: first, that description needs to do more than just craft appearance, and second, it’s good characterization, more than anything, that’s the key to conjuring vivid characters.
Character Description:
Let’s take a look at the following example.
1) When I entered Mr. Smith's office, he stood from his desk and smiled. He had a big nose, brown eyes, and short, blond hair. He wore a dark suit. I shook his hand.
What can you tell me about Mr. Smith from this brief scene? The physical details tell us he has a big nose, brown eyes, and short, blond hair. He’s wearing a dark suit. You can visualize him—but I wonder, can you tell me anything about his personality? His life or past? I suppose you could gather he’s a businessman, considering the suit and office, but what does his big nose say? His brown eyes? His short, blond hair?
Although these details provide an image, what they don’t really do is tell a story. Effective details do, giving readers a glimpse of the grit and eccentricity of the character.
With that in mind, let’s take another crack at this scene, but this time using storytelling details.
2) When I entered Mr. Smith's office, he stood from his desk and smiled. He wore a dark suit, with the shirt collar unbuttoned to reveal the red plume of an ascot. I shook his hand. The knuckles were rough, callused, his grip strong.
Now what can you tell me about Mr. Smith? Well, looking at the suit and ascot, we can tell he has a flamboyant sense of style. There’s confidence there, too, because really, nobody’s pulled off an ascot this well since Fred Jones. As for his rough, callused knuckles and strong grip, maybe he used to work with his hands. Or maybe he isn’t unfamiliar with knocking a few heads together now and again.
This should conjure a far more compelling image of Mr. Smith in your imagination. The key, again, is storytelling details. You need purpose with your descriptions, an aim or goal. As for those "checklist" details, the details you include to satisfy an imaginary quota (like his big nose, brown eyes, and short, blond hair), they're more often than not worth cutting.
Surprise the reader! Avoid the expected in your descriptions, and your character's nuances and personality will come to life.
As for how to do this, the simplest tip I can give is to be specific.
Specificity:
Not just a dark suit, but a suit with the shirt unbuttoned to reveal a red ascot. Not just a handshake, but the feeling of callused knuckles. When you get specific, the details will start to say something about your characters, whether you want them to or not.
For example, if Lucas tells you he wears cologne, you don’t learn much about him. But how does your image of him change when you hear he spritzes his neck every morning with Acqua di Gio? Or gasses his chest with Axe Body Spray? Heck, I once knew a kid who'd spray himself with Fabreze after gym class.
We’re all human and love to make assumptions. All we need are the tiniest details to get started, and hey, if the fish are biting…
Deciding on Details:
To figure out the details appropriate for your character, you could sit down and fill out a character sheet if you'd like: DeviantArt has a bunch of them. But really, I think you just need to start writing, build on your characters as you go, and think about how their personalities might be expressed through description.
But here's a quick word of advice: don't feel the need to spend paragraphs describing your characters. Some writers do, and some writers don't. I used to write heavy descriptions because I thought that was good writing, but it didn't feel natural, and when I finally eased up, it was like a breath of fresh air. You can't write like someone else. You need to write like you.
However, I will say one last thing on the topic.
Characterization over Description:
Character descriptions aren’t actually necessary. Characterization is necessary, but stories can flourish even with very little character description.
My favorite example of an author who understands this is Orson Scott Card. If you read any of his books, you'll quickly realize how little time he spends describing his characters. You're often given only age, gender, and ethnicity to go off of, cold imageless facts, but his characters still come to life. Why? Because of his excellent characterization. We already picture the characters on the intimate level of the soul, so we don't need visual details to carry us along.
There's an argument that goes: the more you describe a character, the more you tear down the image already formed in the reader's mind, an image the reader quite liked; and I believe that's true. At least, it's true for me when I read a story, so I incorporate that into how I write.
Some people think otherwise. They like to be fully immersed in an author's vision, to see as the author sees, and so they revel in heavy description. That's fine, too. We need both types writers for both types of readers.
The choice is yours. What's important, whether you go heavy or light, is that your details shouldn't be of the checklist variety. They need to have purpose, direction. You shouldn't have to tell us that Lisa is a brunette with hazel eyes and high cheekbones. You don’t need to give us her hair color, eye color, height, weight, bust, yada yada. Just guide us to what's important, and we'll do the rest.
In parting, here’s a phrase worth keeping in mind: it's not how much you describe, but what you choose to describe that matters.
After all, you could describe every hair on your character's head, every pimple, if you wanted to. But who’d want to read that?
Enjoy my work? Follow me on Tumblr!
I don't know if you looked at the publish date of this guide, but I wrote it 7 years ago in college. Since then, I've earned an MFA in Fiction, spent a year teaching writing, and now work as a copywriter in New England. I also no longer post on DeviantArt.
But if you'd like more writing advice like you read above, just with an extra 7 years of experience, stop on by my Tumblr, MichaelBjorkWrites , where I post weekly writing advice.
Visit MichaelBjorkWrites.tumblr.com
Related content
Comments: 595
Melmee In reply to Inkfish7 [2012-06-07 09:51:48 +0000 UTC]
you should write more of these 'tuts'
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Swiss-Dilettante In reply to ??? [2012-06-06 12:38:09 +0000 UTC]
Another element of writing that has been brought into the light (in my case). I thank you again, sir!
Oh, and congratulations on making it to the front page!
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Inkfish7 In reply to Swiss-Dilettante [2012-06-06 18:40:26 +0000 UTC]
Thanks! Haha, it surprised me to see it up there. Disrhythmic had to tell me....
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Swiss-Dilettante In reply to Inkfish7 [2012-06-07 22:26:26 +0000 UTC]
Surprised you? I knew it was only a matter of time.
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MetaKnightLucario In reply to ??? [2012-06-06 12:35:08 +0000 UTC]
ohman thanks..I tend to..overdescribe at times. I try not to, but it feels like the reader will miss something if I don't explain every single physical detail. Ya know?
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Inkfish7 In reply to MetaKnightLucario [2012-06-06 18:41:40 +0000 UTC]
Yeah, there's always a slight panic in a every writer, going "Will they get it?" It can really be a struggle to find the right balance.
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ketkazva In reply to ??? [2012-06-06 12:23:08 +0000 UTC]
this is really helpful
i'm working on a sci-fi/fiction story and, honestly, i tend to describe things a lot (ambient stuff, mostly) even using other senses, not just the "seeing" process, but also the "feeling".
i have one question remaining: am i allowed to include external references (let's say i'm including Fiona Apple or Hatsune Miku as a character); do i have to ask for permission from her managers or whatever?
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Inkfish7 In reply to ketkazva [2012-06-06 18:43:17 +0000 UTC]
Yes, using all five senses in an extremely effective way to improve your imagery.
As for your outside reference question... I'm afraid I don't know.
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JustxEden In reply to ??? [2012-06-06 12:17:36 +0000 UTC]
Very useful information, fave'd to review for later usage. Thanks.
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Inkfish7 In reply to JustxEden [2012-06-06 18:43:49 +0000 UTC]
Yep! Hope you get some use out of it
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spookykitty123 In reply to ??? [2012-06-06 11:46:05 +0000 UTC]
This is really wonderful - very helpful.
I've been reading a book that follows the same points as your guide; not giving the "flat nose, short brown hair" details. At first I was a little lost as to who these characters were, not having much to base them on, but as I got further intot he book, and their personalities began to show, I suddenly found myself knowing these people, as if I'd met them in real life, and their physical appearance no longer bothered me, as I subconciously crafted my own picture of them.
I'll defiently try to tweak this into my writing ability, as I've always slightly uncertain when it comes to desprictions of my characters, being unsure how much information I should put, and whther or not forcing my image of that person into someone else's mind is a good idea. Brilliant advice, thank you.
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Inkfish7 In reply to spookykitty123 [2012-06-06 18:44:46 +0000 UTC]
No problem! Glad to be of help
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Skorpychan In reply to ??? [2012-06-06 11:44:56 +0000 UTC]
This is really useful. Faved for later use.
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Desinent-River In reply to ??? [2012-06-06 11:43:13 +0000 UTC]
And so, despite how much work, detail and effort went into making this guide
Twilight still failed every single point
...and yet is still more successful than the majority of books that did follow this guide
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Inkfish7 In reply to Desinent-River [2012-06-06 21:50:40 +0000 UTC]
That's life, friend. It sucks... but it's true.
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Desinent-River In reply to Inkfish7 [2012-06-06 21:58:03 +0000 UTC]
Yups, proof that there is hope for anyone
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Swiss-Dilettante In reply to Desinent-River [2012-06-06 12:36:09 +0000 UTC]
....
Lackaday!
That is sad. :\
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Desinent-River In reply to Swiss-Dilettante [2012-06-06 12:41:44 +0000 UTC]
what is "Lackaday!"?
and yeah, such is life...
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Swiss-Dilettante In reply to Desinent-River [2012-06-06 12:53:53 +0000 UTC]
Er, it is an archaic expression of regret, sorrow, dismay, or disapproval (near exact definition that Dictionary.com provides...).
Yes. We people must learn to forgo such trivial disappointments, though.
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Desinent-River In reply to Swiss-Dilettante [2012-06-06 14:54:39 +0000 UTC]
oh, fair enough xD
aye, it's just discouraging when less-than-skilled work becomes hugely successful just because the author is well connected and nothing else was being published that particular week so they slap a huge "best seller" sticker on the front to fool people into thinking it is an example of worthy writing...
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Swiss-Dilettante In reply to Desinent-River [2012-06-06 15:27:21 +0000 UTC]
True, true. But it must have something worthy about it, otherwise it wouldn't be as popular as it is.
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Desinent-River In reply to Swiss-Dilettante [2012-06-06 16:55:11 +0000 UTC]
It's more a question of "why would I, as a publisher, give money to this woman who clearly shows she doesn't know story structure, characterization or mise en scenne in this manuscript?"
being a "bestseller" by default is something I suppose... (this is before the movies when it wasn't that popular)
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Swiss-Dilettante In reply to Desinent-River [2012-06-07 22:28:36 +0000 UTC]
I'll have to take your word for it. Even though I've heard the same thing from others.
Yeah. The movie industry saw the potential of Twilight, and then proceeded to make money from countless teenage girls... XD
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Desinent-River In reply to Swiss-Dilettante [2012-06-08 00:55:06 +0000 UTC]
Alas, fact is that it is not our choice to make, someone took a leap of faith and it paid off
what conclusion you come to may or may not differ but remember this, Kevin Smith pitched an idea of Superman vs a giant mechanical spider and it was labelled stupid, the next year "Wild wild west" came out O_o
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Swiss-Dilettante In reply to Desinent-River [2012-06-11 14:11:14 +0000 UTC]
Leaps of faith are important. That's....
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Desinent-River In reply to Swiss-Dilettante [2012-06-11 14:23:13 +0000 UTC]
Life is all about taking risks, but not simply having faith in something there is no evidence of nor can help you in any way >.>
yeah, it was hilarious cause wild wild west was shite, I would have prefered to see Superman fighting a giant mechanical spider
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Swiss-Dilettante In reply to Desinent-River [2012-06-13 12:36:57 +0000 UTC]
That's true. A lot of people have faith in things.
I know! Tear the mechanical spiders leg of and then proceed to whack the beast with it, Superman!
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Swiss-Dilettante In reply to Desinent-River [2012-06-15 02:35:06 +0000 UTC]
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DevilKid-chan In reply to ??? [2012-06-06 11:36:21 +0000 UTC]
Wow, this is actually really helpful
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MattTheWriter In reply to ??? [2012-06-06 10:44:55 +0000 UTC]
"He wore a black suit, with a crisp tie and golden cuff links."
First lesson in narrative writing: Show, don't tell.
"His black suit hung neatly around his plump body, which was also draped with a crisp tie. As he extended his calloused hand towards me, a golden cuff link shone with the brilliant morning light which radiated through the grey venetian blinds to the east side of the room."
See how I didn't add that much more description, but I expanded it to sound nicer, still without adding so many adjectives, which, in large amounts, block the flow of the story.
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spookykitty123 In reply to MattTheWriter [2012-06-06 19:22:49 +0000 UTC]
I think they just meant to illustrate, basically, how this technique is done, without the extra description you'd normally find within a book. "He wore a black suit, with a crisp tie and golden cuff links" is just an example, so it seems.
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YukaYotu In reply to MattTheWriter [2012-06-06 13:20:49 +0000 UTC]
far too descriptive. Good for poetry, yes, but not for a story.
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MattTheWriter In reply to YukaYotu [2012-06-07 06:05:09 +0000 UTC]
Ah, but it is show not tell. You don't have to use as much description as I did, but instead of stating facts, you should weave the facts into a description.
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YukaYotu In reply to MattTheWriter [2012-06-07 13:43:16 +0000 UTC]
You could, that is true, but again that would be more for a poetic writing style, which is much more draining for a normal writer to do. You focus on poetry, I'm guessing, and that's your style. it's like telling a graphite artist to paint a picture. not as easy for them.
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MattTheWriter In reply to YukaYotu [2012-06-08 06:11:10 +0000 UTC]
No, I prefer to write, but that takes longer. I use that style in my prose, as well, and I'd encourage it because it does allow the reader to create a sharper and more interesting image.
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Hayaros In reply to ??? [2012-06-06 10:02:19 +0000 UTC]
Wow, this sure is interesting.
Thank you for sharing this.
I'm not one who loves writing physical descriptions, and I usually leave the characterization to my characters's dialogues and actions, but there's always room for improvement
Thank you again!
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binks95 In reply to ??? [2012-06-06 09:59:18 +0000 UTC]
I now have the urge to write O.o... Thanks for this! It's really handy XD
Lozzi xx @--;----
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