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dear boy,

i've come up with a few new ideas to write about, and hopefully they will transform from invisible thoughts into beautiful words that can drip from my tongue like honey and blossom on the paper i have before me.

for now though, my legs are shaking and my nails are torn. i keep biting my lips. i can't form a coherent sentence and i'm afraid this will last forever. diary, what's happening to me? is it possible that i've fallen in love again even after i've sworn i wouldn't?

boy, do you know where my heart is? i seem to have misplaced it, can you tell me where it is, darling? it's making a relatively sane girl lose her mind. and i've heard you're keeping a secret from me. i'm curious as to what it is. was it that you've stolen my heart from me when i wasn't looking?

and yet i don't mind sharing my heart with you. i know that you'll keep it safe, caress it and whisper sweet promises to it at night. i know that you won't break it, even if you are a bit clumsy at times. besides there's no hope, no happy ending in the dark. i want you to bring light into this dreary life, i want you to bring out the sun from behind the clouds and send that rain away.

i've already asked the others to give me back those days and nights that were stripped away from me, but i think i'll let you keep yours. the breeze of early spring, the morning light rising up over the city as i sip a coffee at a computer desk, rushed deadlines, nights spent relaxing and unwinding at the centre, this is what we share. i wouldn't have it any other way.

and as for prom? yes, i would love to go with you. i can't imagine sitting home alone that night, or even working and seeing the girls in their lovely dresses coming in for a midnight gallivant and a snack along the way. there's nowhere else i would rather be then out on that dance floor with you.

boy, you took my heart away from me, you owe me this much.