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Author's Note: Rosette's name has been changed to Evelyn Jenkins. I am editing each of the chapters as we speak and will put up their updated versions during this week and next week.

Chapter 7

Death is peaceful. You may say it’s silent --- utterly, sickeningly silent. All sound had evaporated, and all reality along with it. There was only me; only me and the darkness.
I was floating. No, flying. No, soaring to some unknown destination. All I knew was that I had to get there. No light, no caress, no poetic description of death graced me --- only the chill of the end and the misery of losing.
It may be said that the greatest battle ever lost is Death, for no matter how many times you think you have beaten him, you will eventually let him win at least once.
My eyes were shut tight. My ears were clogged. My whole body was numb, feeling nothing. All I could sense was the speed. It was unspeakable. Watching him, it had looked like Everett was teleporting, but in his arms (which I “deduced” I was possibly) it was as if I was . . . like I said, soaring. I wanted to stay like this forever --- caught between life and death; darkness; peace. It was amazing. Finally, Serenity was my companion in this corridor of suffocating loneliness.
That was when Reality strangled me. Sure, peace was wonderful, but at the price of a lonely existence…
I was solitary, I was . . . vulnerable. I was deserted! I was left alone to my memories of those eyes! His eyes. No, not Everett’s --- his. Those eyes with no name; that voice with no resistance.
I was shaken with a cold epiphany: I was not dead.
Anyone else would have been pleased; but for this painstaking, guilt-ridden, misjudging, drained body, it was torture to stay alive. An abyss of lonely independence enveloped me --- I would stay this way. Nothing was peaceful about Death anymore, for I could not escape the voices.
Everett’s, Valerie’s, Riley’s, Mitchell’s, that alluring and terrifying stranger --- even my mom’s voice resounded through faded images and twisted thoughts. My mind seemed to work overtime instead of simply submerging. Every memory I had of the past months flashed through my mind, the voices accompanying every one. Louder and louder, faster and faster; the voices taunted me with words I had attempted to purge from my memory. Every solitary fact that proved Everett’s innocence seemed to throw itself down before me.
My guilt would never leave.
Just when I began to struggle to switch off my thoughts, just when I could bear it no more, just when the voices rose to an implacable level, she appeared.
She had no body; she had no form. There was merely her presence. Her presence and mine. She glided over to me as a spirit, whisking around me menacingly with a transcendent grin playing upon her mouth. All I could see of her was a black mist with the slight form of a face. Yet, I also saw her as a human. She stood there, staring me down, waiting for me to crack.
When my gaze could no longer hold hers, she paced away with an enchanting laugh. Looking down at my “hands”, I realized I was in the same structure as her --- spirit, yet body; mist, yet form. Her captivating laugh waned to a stop as she abruptly appeared before me. Her hands shoved my chin up to look me in the eyes.
They were . . . empty, lifeless. Her eyes were two black holes with nothing but void to shape them. They pricked into mine with impeccable scrutiny, a wicked smirk frolicking through every glint.
I instinctively tripped backward, only causing her to crane my neck painfully towards her. She cocked her head curiously with another wicked grin. “Hello,” uttered the thousand echoes that were her voice. I moaned softly in pain, which only forced her tighten her grip. “Welcome to Hell.” The grin seemed to erupt across her face, and those pointed, dangerous teeth let four words slither past them: “It’s in your head.”
As soon as she let go of me to twist around and laugh that hideous laugh again, I scrambled backward as fast as I could until I hit a “wall.” Sinking down, I hid there in that corner, trying to convince myself of just what exactly was happening and trying to decide whether I wanted to believe it was real or not.
Hours upon hours, she stared at me, her eyes seething with hatred. I attempted to avoid her gaze, safely in my corner, thinking of all the books I had ever read and replaying them in my thoughts. That was when I realized not even my thoughts were safe in here. Every single word I thought echoed through the room as if it had escaped my lips. However, I had not let out a single sound, not since I came here.
I tried to bar my thoughts. Nevertheless, I wondered what would happen if I actually spoke. “Hello?” I whispered. In less than a second, there was an echo from somewhere outside. “Hello?” I stood up and began to yell. Again, an echo outside. My thoughts went haywire. Perhaps this meant an escape! There was a way out of here! Her laughter grew louder and louder as I scurried about, inspecting every inch for freedom. However, no opening appeared, no plan hatched itself in my brain, and no motive but liberty explained my madness.
For minutes, hours --- eternity, it felt like! --- I scampered back and forth. When I was just about to scream in frustration and built-up fear, two wide bright openings appeared, flashing the way to liberty. It was as if someone had flung the curtains off the wide windows of a long-darkened room. Her captivating laugh faded away into a wicked scream as the sunlight whisked her away. Suddenly, I was back in my own eyes.
I quickly assessed my surroundings, scrutinizing everything. It only took seconds for me to realize the “room” I had just been in was my mind. My eyes focused and soon everything became an object instead of overlapping blurs. When my gaze targeted a movement to my left, then I came face-to-face with Everett Caine.
Immediately, the flashbacks overtook me. Silence enveloped the room. I couldn’t believe it . . .
Everett: whom I accused so long as being my stalker and murderer; whom I blatantly spat in the face of; who was dead to me . . .
Everett: who protected me, whether I wanted it or not; who took my accusations without word; . . . who . . . who saved my life.
That thought choked up in my head as guilt spilled over me as if I were a glass of water too-far filled. How could I have thought that of him? After all he had done for me? The answer was clear. I was blind. I was naïve. I had thought I could figure it out myself, and that had almost cost me my life --- by pushing my protector away and making the path completely clear for my murderer.
I was dead now.
My heart was beating, I was breathing, but I was dead.
Suddenly, his eyes bore into mine. The intensity of the situation strangled me, and my guilt definitely threatened to. As I struggled to get enough air, all oxygen burst out of my lungs. I was choking on my own idiocy.
However, as I was writhing in suffocation, I realized it wasn’t just abstract concepts constricting my lungs. They were withering, dwindling into nothingness. I could feel it. “Everett…” I managed to gasp, and he was by my side in a moment. I was astonished, for after all I had done . . .It was sickening: the fact that after I had banned him from every inch of my life in every way possible that he was still with me, here, by my side. Still.
My thoughts seemed to form his words as he whispered next to my ear, “I’m right here, Rosette. I’m staying here.” His voice was colder than I remembered, like the words were only a courtesy, not sincere. But I swallowed that feeling down before I became an idiot again.
Although comforted by his presence, I could already hear her wicked laughter resonating through my mind. I dared not close my eyes, for fear that I might find myself in that room again. The suffocation had not ebbed at all: I had given up the fight to breathe. Speaking was impossible, so I struggled to smile in acknowledgement of his words, despite my moronic feelings about them.
The pain came out of nowhere.
A vicious scream ripped through my throat as my whole body seemed to tear in two. Organs exploded inside me, muscles ripped to shreds, my bones broke and broke again --- yet no blood pooled over or around me. All vessels of that now-useless liquid stayed intact, it seemed. They were protected by some unknown source throughout the destruction. As painful spasms overtook my body, I was comforted by Everett’s hand clasped around my own. I squeezed it tighter and tighter as the gleaming white enveloped me.

I opened my eyes.
I was in the corner, fetal position, her seething down at me from a new prop in this formerly-empty room: a small chair. I immediately donned it her “throne.” She lazily lounged in it like she owned the place, her eyes condescending and her lips curled into that ever-existing grin. The spasms still racked my body as they did outside, and the pain still felt so real. She’ll kill me, I thought, and immediately regretted it as I remembered even thoughts were not private.
“Oh, no, no, no!” She clicked her tongue as she rose from the chair and sauntered over to me. “Dear, I’m here to torture you out of existence! Hell, remember? It’s very different, you see.” Her thousand voices seemed to surround and choke the life out of me. “See, this,” She brutally kicked me between the ribs a few times amid spasms, eventually crushing her foot down on my lungs, “this is torture.” She jabbed at my stomach to turn me over, with a swift blow to the spine afterward. Pain seared up and down my body, along with the burst from the spasms. She grasped the back of my head, her sharp fingernails digging deep into the scalp and even skull. I cried out in pain, but that only made her dig deeper. She yanked me up by her fingernails and I began to feel the blood trickling down my face. “This, my darling, is killing.” She lifted me at least two feet from the ground, turning my head and examining it. I flailed in her arms, the spasms giving way to waxing seizures.
Scrutinizing every inch of my face, she scoffed, “What a waste…”
Instantly, I crumpled against something hard, which I assumed was the opposite “wall.” If I had been in my physical state, I would have heard the bones crack. I did hear it distantly from outside and then let out a horrid scream of fear-mingled pain. She had thrown me to the side just like the trash she thought I was. Slowly, I lifted myself up halfway and leaned on the “wall,” my right shoulder screaming at the effort. The wound sent shooting pain down my arm and I winced as my seizures resumed. My head was spinning as I fully stood. She was there beside me. ‘Lovingly’, she turned my head towards her by the chin.
“Don’t worry, my dear little weakling,” Here she grinned horrifically. “I’m not here to kill you . . . but you’ll wish I was.” She threw my head back as she let go and loosed a demonic backhand that had me sprawling across the floor again. Amazingly, no teeth came out and I heard no choking outside, but I did hold that side of my face as it started to swell. She stalked off to her throne, her thousand voices chuckling along with her, and I crawled over to my corner to let my seizures overtake me.
The pain was unbearable.
In and out of my mind I slipped for who knows how long --- it could have been days. The seizures kept up, worse and worse until I thought they were surely fatal. I had lost sense of what was going on long ago, but I could hear voices.

There was Everett, of course. I could recognize his voice perfectly even through my muddiness. And my pain seemed to intensify with every word he spoke, but I hung on every one of them.
Valerie was harder to pick out. At times, it was only Everett’s voice, and nothing else made sense to me. However, sometimes I would recognize Valerie’s. Sleek and strong, piercing --- that was Valerie: beauty to hide the beast. Most of the reason, besides my loss of sense, that it was hard to recognize her was that I could hardly understand was she was saying. She used that fastspeak for most of her talking, as she had in the car that day, probably because she didn’t want me to know what she was saying; and I didn’t want to know. However, as the seizures progressed and grew more fatal, I began to understand more of her fastspeak: I could pick out a word here and there clearly, but not enough to try to understand.
There was a third voice, a man’s --- soft, withdrawn, with a deep undertone. I didn’t recognize his voice, and I barely heard it.
And the fourth…oh! the fourth voice was the most beautiful thing I had ever heard. It was a girl’s voice, a small voice, but like music every time she spoke. I loved that voice, and hung onto its every sound. It was wind chimes! Or a canary’s song! Or even sleigh bells! And still those three wrapped into one. Beautiful…
As my sense finally lapsed, those voices soothed me. They kept me from losing all of reality. I was grateful for that, because the next part was the worst.

I was lost in a nightmare. It was like she had taken all my memories and opened them like a book. And neither my eyes nor my mind opened as an escape. She played the worst parts of my life repeatedly, laughing maniacally. Her favorite part was the past few days before all this. My pain and confusion fed and nourished her. I hadn’t let my past affect me before. My routine life had stayed routine. But I was reminded that Everett had come in and changed all of that. He had mixed up my ordinary schedule I had used to hide my insecurity. He had lifted the shell off me and exposed every vulnerability. And somehow, I was grateful for that. I would make this vulnerability my strength.
But then she hit the mark. As soon as I saw the fuzzy image of a shabby station wagon pulling into the driveway I wanted to scream. But I was lost. I was trapped.

Through a little girl’s eyes I watched. The station wagon parked and the headlights turned off. She quickly left the window and ran to the door with the exclamation “Daddy!”
I was the little girl.
I had felt so little then; I had grown up so fast.
The second he opened the door, I ran into his arms. “Hey, sweetie!” he whispered as he picked me up and spun me. I could feel every emotion as I had then, which made it even worse. I wanted to shut it out. Any memory but this; anything but this. However, no matter how much I begged, it kept going.
My mom stood in the doorway to the den. Her face was swollen, her hair was disheveled, she was holding a ring. Daddy’s ring. I wasn’t stupid enough to not realize it wasn’t on his finger. He slowly set me down. I had known something was wrong, but now my worst fears were coming true.
“Dana…” My dad stepped forward.
“No!”
I cringed at the volume, but my dad’s face stayed cold.
“No, Harry!” her voice rose. “Do you know where I found this?” She shook the ring at him. “Why? Why Harry?!” Tears went streaming down her face.
He took another step forward. “But Ev---“
She gritted her teeth and never took her eyes off of him. “She’s old enough to know the truth!” Mom spat. More tears spilled down her cheeks.
My dad’s face turned grave. “Go to your room.” I knew he was speaking to me, but I didn’t budge. I wouldn’t! “Evelyn,” he warned, but my feet stayed rooted to the spot. My mistake was letting a single tear fall down my cheek. “Go!” he snapped, tearing his eyes away from my mom. I stepped backward and my mom gave me a look of pity. Her face was so sad. She looked so dead. I knew the life I had was ending, but I ran up the stairs anyway. I couldn’t look at either of them any longer. I stopped at the top of the stairs, hiding behind the bit of wall that kept me from their view. I wanted to run to my room, but my exhaustion caused me to collapse there, just out of their view. I laid there and sobbed, as the yelling behind me grew louder.

She knew.
She knew now. And there was nothing I could do about it. She'd found the one weak spot I could never mask. The one that had taken so long to heal, but could still be torn open so easily. Now she knew just where to hit me whenever she felt like torturing me.
But it wouldn't be too much fun for her. After the initial pain, I just laid there, still and quiet. After a while, I guess she grew bored and I was allowed back into my own body again. The spasms had stopped, and now I just felt numb and empty. I could feel all the changes that had taken place inside of me. And I felt...cold. It was like someone had rubbed peppermint into all my pores. It was refreshing at first, but then washed over my body like frostbite. The nostalgic feel of peppermint soon turned into icicles boring into my pores and then racing down my still-miraculously-intact blood vessels.
I let loose a horrid scream just before the frost bubbled up into my throat. In a moment, Valerie was towering over me. I painfully turned my eyes up to meet hers. Somehow, hers seemed even more dangerous than before. They were dark and menacing. I couldn't see any fiery flecks in them. I still didn't know what that meant, but I had learned to associate the monster with that eye colour.
Without thinking, I scrambled backward, forgetting that I was lying completely flat. The wall just behind my head reminded me of that with a disapproving knock to my skull. I could feel the hard hit, but unlike before there was no pain with it. I knew I had hit my head, but that was about it. I didn't have time to think about this before Valerie quickly reclaimed my attention. Her sharp nails dug into my shoulders, and this time I did feel pain. In fact, I even felt droplets of cold blood slowly roll down my shoulders. Wait, cold...? Shouldn't my blood be warm? I suddenly heard the sound of frantic sniffing before Valerie's face quickly changing from fierce to relieved.
“Oh, thank God....” she sighed, “You're almost changed.” I didn't know what she meant, but whatever it was it made the blackness in her eyes soften a bit. However, she turned fierce once more as she locked her eyes with mine. “You're going to enter the last few stages. They're going to take days, and are going to be the worst you've ever felt. But whatever you do, don't let her win. Never let her win.” She spat these words at me firmly, shaking me to emphasize her point. Did she know about the creature inside my mind, too? And what did she mean by stages? And changed?
I was so lost. I wanted to ask her more questions, but I couldn't speak. The frost had taken my mouth, too. I was paralyzed except for my eyes. So I did all I could do: I examined my newly-detailed surroundings. Everything seemed so much clearer now. Colours were more vivid and, in a way, louder. It's hard to explain. It was as if everything I looked at was in 3D. The world seemed to pop out at me in a new way. It was hard to get used to and, if I wasn't already in enough pain, I would have had a headache. Part of me wondered if I really would, though. The knock to my head hadn't hurt at all. It seemed like the only pain I was feeling was the changes taking place inside of me. And suddenly it occurred to me that maybe that was the only pain I could feel anymore. It made sense and at the same time confused me even more. The frost was weaving itself through my brain and somehow my thoughts. Still, if it was the frost that had brought my world into such vivid focus, I didn’t mind at all. I just wished it would stop the pain. Ice was supposed to numb, right? This train of thought was only making me more and more lost, and I was slowly realizing that the more I thought the more muddied and blurry each thought became even though my vision was still detailed and perfect. This just wasn’t making any sense.
“You need to rest.” That last word seemed to amuse Valerie for some reason: I could hear the subtle laugh that escaped her lips. I saw a slight smile grace her face for the first time ever. But before I could enjoy this rare occurrence, it was gone again. In a more serious tone than before, she continued. “Prepare yourself for what’s to come. Get acquainted with your own head so that you know exactly who the ruler is in there. Thankfully, she’ll be gone for a little bit as your body turns the changes on and off, so you have time to get ready.” She spoke this like a speech she’d said many times before, rummaging through something on the other side of the room. I couldn’t see what because of the paralysis, but the the sounds weren’t frantic so I guess it wasn’t all that important. Then again, Valerie was cool, calm, and collected; more than any person I’d known. And even though she’d treated me like a disease, I secretly loved her for it. At least someone was willing to give me a reality check every once in a while. “…can’t move, so that’s the downside.” Apparently she’d been giving me more instructions while my mind had wandered off. STUPID! What if that was important?! I struggled to pay more attention. “The paralysis will last the rest of change. Could take days, could take hours. Who knows? Everyone is different.” Her voice was now bored and clearly gave away that she’d been through all this before. I’d given up on trying to understand what was going on. Whatever “change” was happening was keeping me alive, so I chose to focus on that much.
With one more bout of frantic sniffing around me, she finally took off in a hurry. Apparently she had something better to do. I wasn’t pleased with the abrupt exit, because she had left me to my thoughts, but maybe I needed this. I took this long period of time alone to mull over her words and try to mentally pinch myself.
What the heck was going on?

Description
body div#devskin0 hr { }

Author's Note: Rosette's name has been changed to Evelyn Jenkins. I am editing each of the chapters as we speak and will put up their updated versions during this week and next week.

Chapter 7

Death is peaceful. You may say it’s silent --- utterly, sickeningly silent. All sound had evaporated, and all reality along with it. There was only me; only me and the darkness.
I was floating. No, flying. No, soaring to some unknown destination. All I knew was that I had to get there. No light, no caress, no poetic description of death graced me --- only the chill of the end and the misery of losing.
It may be said that the greatest battle ever lost is Death, for no matter how many times you think you have beaten him, you will eventually let him win at least once.
My eyes were shut tight. My ears were clogged. My whole body was numb, feeling nothing. All I could sense was the speed. It was unspeakable. Watching him, it had looked like Everett was teleporting, but in his arms (which I “deduced” I was possibly) it was as if I was . . . like I said, soaring. I wanted to stay like this forever --- caught between life and death; darkness; peace. It was amazing. Finally, Serenity was my companion in this corridor of suffocating loneliness.
That was when Reality strangled me. Sure, peace was wonderful, but at the price of a lonely existence…
I was solitary, I was . . . vulnerable. I was deserted! I was left alone to my memories of those eyes! His eyes. No, not Everett’s --- his. Those eyes with no name; that voice with no resistance.
I was shaken with a cold epiphany: I was not dead.
Anyone else would have been pleased; but for this painstaking, guilt-ridden, misjudging, drained body, it was torture to stay alive. An abyss of lonely independence enveloped me --- I would stay this way. Nothing was peaceful about Death anymore, for I could not escape the voices.
Everett’s, Valerie’s, Riley’s, Mitchell’s, that alluring and terrifying stranger --- even my mom’s voice resounded through faded images and twisted thoughts. My mind seemed to work overtime instead of simply submerging. Every memory I had of the past months flashed through my mind, the voices accompanying every one. Louder and louder, faster and faster; the voices taunted me with words I had attempted to purge from my memory. Every solitary fact that proved Everett’s innocence seemed to throw itself down before me.
My guilt would never leave.
Just when I began to struggle to switch off my thoughts, just when I could bear it no more, just when the voices rose to an implacable level, she appeared.
She had no body; she had no form. There was merely her presence. Her presence and mine. She glided over to me as a spirit, whisking around me menacingly with a transcendent grin playing upon her mouth. All I could see of her was a black mist with the slight form of a face. Yet, I also saw her as a human. She stood there, staring me down, waiting for me to crack.
When my gaze could no longer hold hers, she paced away with an enchanting laugh. Looking down at my “hands”, I realized I was in the same structure as her --- spirit, yet body; mist, yet form. Her captivating laugh waned to a stop as she abruptly appeared before me. Her hands shoved my chin up to look me in the eyes.
They were . . . empty, lifeless. Her eyes were two black holes with nothing but void to shape them. They pricked into mine with impeccable scrutiny, a wicked smirk frolicking through every glint.
I instinctively tripped backward, only causing her to crane my neck painfully towards her. She cocked her head curiously with another wicked grin. “Hello,” uttered the thousand echoes that were her voice. I moaned softly in pain, which only forced her tighten her grip. “Welcome to Hell.” The grin seemed to erupt across her face, and those pointed, dangerous teeth let four words slither past them: “It’s in your head.”
As soon as she let go of me to twist around and laugh that hideous laugh again, I scrambled backward as fast as I could until I hit a “wall.” Sinking down, I hid there in that corner, trying to convince myself of just what exactly was happening and trying to decide whether I wanted to believe it was real or not.
Hours upon hours, she stared at me, her eyes seething with hatred. I attempted to avoid her gaze, safely in my corner, thinking of all the books I had ever read and replaying them in my thoughts. That was when I realized not even my thoughts were safe in here. Every single word I thought echoed through the room as if it had escaped my lips. However, I had not let out a single sound, not since I came here.
I tried to bar my thoughts. Nevertheless, I wondered what would happen if I actually spoke. “Hello?” I whispered. In less than a second, there was an echo from somewhere outside. “Hello?” I stood up and began to yell. Again, an echo outside. My thoughts went haywire. Perhaps this meant an escape! There was a way out of here! Her laughter grew louder and louder as I scurried about, inspecting every inch for freedom. However, no opening appeared, no plan hatched itself in my brain, and no motive but liberty explained my madness.
For minutes, hours --- eternity, it felt like! --- I scampered back and forth. When I was just about to scream in frustration and built-up fear, two wide bright openings appeared, flashing the way to liberty. It was as if someone had flung the curtains off the wide windows of a long-darkened room. Her captivating laugh faded away into a wicked scream as the sunlight whisked her away. Suddenly, I was back in my own eyes.
I quickly assessed my surroundings, scrutinizing everything. It only took seconds for me to realize the “room” I had just been in was my mind. My eyes focused and soon everything became an object instead of overlapping blurs. When my gaze targeted a movement to my left, then I came face-to-face with Everett Caine.
Immediately, the flashbacks overtook me. Silence enveloped the room. I couldn’t believe it . . .
Everett: whom I accused so long as being my stalker and murderer; whom I blatantly spat in the face of; who was dead to me . . .
Everett: who protected me, whether I wanted it or not; who took my accusations without word; . . . who . . . who saved my life.
That thought choked up in my head as guilt spilled over me as if I were a glass of water too-far filled. How could I have thought that of him? After all he had done for me? The answer was clear. I was blind. I was naïve. I had thought I could figure it out myself, and that had almost cost me my life --- by pushing my protector away and making the path completely clear for my murderer.
I was dead now.
My heart was beating, I was breathing, but I was dead.
Suddenly, his eyes bore into mine. The intensity of the situation strangled me, and my guilt definitely threatened to. As I struggled to get enough air, all oxygen burst out of my lungs. I was choking on my own idiocy.
However, as I was writhing in suffocation, I realized it wasn’t just abstract concepts constricting my lungs. They were withering, dwindling into nothingness. I could feel it. “Everett…” I managed to gasp, and he was by my side in a moment. I was astonished, for after all I had done . . .It was sickening: the fact that after I had banned him from every inch of my life in every way possible that he was still with me, here, by my side. Still.
My thoughts seemed to form his words as he whispered next to my ear, “I’m right here, Rosette. I’m staying here.” His voice was colder than I remembered, like the words were only a courtesy, not sincere. But I swallowed that feeling down before I became an idiot again.
Although comforted by his presence, I could already hear her wicked laughter resonating through my mind. I dared not close my eyes, for fear that I might find myself in that room again. The suffocation had not ebbed at all: I had given up the fight to breathe. Speaking was impossible, so I struggled to smile in acknowledgement of his words, despite my moronic feelings about them.
The pain came out of nowhere.
A vicious scream ripped through my throat as my whole body seemed to tear in two. Organs exploded inside me, muscles ripped to shreds, my bones broke and broke again --- yet no blood pooled over or around me. All vessels of that now-useless liquid stayed intact, it seemed. They were protected by some unknown source throughout the destruction. As painful spasms overtook my body, I was comforted by Everett’s hand clasped around my own. I squeezed it tighter and tighter as the gleaming white enveloped me.

I opened my eyes.
I was in the corner, fetal position, her seething down at me from a new prop in this formerly-empty room: a small chair. I immediately donned it her “throne.” She lazily lounged in it like she owned the place, her eyes condescending and her lips curled into that ever-existing grin. The spasms still racked my body as they did outside, and the pain still felt so real. She’ll kill me, I thought, and immediately regretted it as I remembered even thoughts were not private.
“Oh, no, no, no!” She clicked her tongue as she rose from the chair and sauntered over to me. “Dear, I’m here to torture you out of existence! Hell, remember? It’s very different, you see.” Her thousand voices seemed to surround and choke the life out of me. “See, this,” She brutally kicked me between the ribs a few times amid spasms, eventually crushing her foot down on my lungs, “this is torture.” She jabbed at my stomach to turn me over, with a swift blow to the spine afterward. Pain seared up and down my body, along with the burst from the spasms. She grasped the back of my head, her sharp fingernails digging deep into the scalp and even skull. I cried out in pain, but that only made her dig deeper. She yanked me up by her fingernails and I began to feel the blood trickling down my face. “This, my darling, is killing.” She lifted me at least two feet from the ground, turning my head and examining it. I flailed in her arms, the spasms giving way to waxing seizures.
Scrutinizing every inch of my face, she scoffed, “What a waste…”
Instantly, I crumpled against something hard, which I assumed was the opposite “wall.” If I had been in my physical state, I would have heard the bones crack. I did hear it distantly from outside and then let out a horrid scream of fear-mingled pain. She had thrown me to the side just like the trash she thought I was. Slowly, I lifted myself up halfway and leaned on the “wall,” my right shoulder screaming at the effort. The wound sent shooting pain down my arm and I winced as my seizures resumed. My head was spinning as I fully stood. She was there beside me. ‘Lovingly’, she turned my head towards her by the chin.
“Don’t worry, my dear little weakling,” Here she grinned horrifically. “I’m not here to kill you . . . but you’ll wish I was.” She threw my head back as she let go and loosed a demonic backhand that had me sprawling across the floor again. Amazingly, no teeth came out and I heard no choking outside, but I did hold that side of my face as it started to swell. She stalked off to her throne, her thousand voices chuckling along with her, and I crawled over to my corner to let my seizures overtake me.
The pain was unbearable.
In and out of my mind I slipped for who knows how long --- it could have been days. The seizures kept up, worse and worse until I thought they were surely fatal. I had lost sense of what was going on long ago, but I could hear voices.

There was Everett, of course. I could recognize his voice perfectly even through my muddiness. And my pain seemed to intensify with every word he spoke, but I hung on every one of them.
Valerie was harder to pick out. At times, it was only Everett’s voice, and nothing else made sense to me. However, sometimes I would recognize Valerie’s. Sleek and strong, piercing --- that was Valerie: beauty to hide the beast. Most of the reason, besides my loss of sense, that it was hard to recognize her was that I could hardly understand was she was saying. She used that fastspeak for most of her talking, as she had in the car that day, probably because she didn’t want me to know what she was saying; and I didn’t want to know. However, as the seizures progressed and grew more fatal, I began to understand more of her fastspeak: I could pick out a word here and there clearly, but not enough to try to understand.
There was a third voice, a man’s --- soft, withdrawn, with a deep undertone. I didn’t recognize his voice, and I barely heard it.
And the fourth…oh! the fourth voice was the most beautiful thing I had ever heard. It was a girl’s voice, a small voice, but like music every time she spoke. I loved that voice, and hung onto its every sound. It was wind chimes! Or a canary’s song! Or even sleigh bells! And still those three wrapped into one. Beautiful…
As my sense finally lapsed, those voices soothed me. They kept me from losing all of reality. I was grateful for that, because the next part was the worst.

I was lost in a nightmare. It was like she had taken all my memories and opened them like a book. And neither my eyes nor my mind opened as an escape. She played the worst parts of my life repeatedly, laughing maniacally. Her favorite part was the past few days before all this. My pain and confusion fed and nourished her. I hadn’t let my past affect me before. My routine life had stayed routine. But I was reminded that Everett had come in and changed all of that. He had mixed up my ordinary schedule I had used to hide my insecurity. He had lifted the shell off me and exposed every vulnerability. And somehow, I was grateful for that. I would make this vulnerability my strength.
But then she hit the mark. As soon as I saw the fuzzy image of a shabby station wagon pulling into the driveway I wanted to scream. But I was lost. I was trapped.

Through a little girl’s eyes I watched. The station wagon parked and the headlights turned off. She quickly left the window and ran to the door with the exclamation “Daddy!”
I was the little girl.
I had felt so little then; I had grown up so fast.
The second he opened the door, I ran into his arms. “Hey, sweetie!” he whispered as he picked me up and spun me. I could feel every emotion as I had then, which made it even worse. I wanted to shut it out. Any memory but this; anything but this. However, no matter how much I begged, it kept going.
My mom stood in the doorway to the den. Her face was swollen, her hair was disheveled, she was holding a ring. Daddy’s ring. I wasn’t stupid enough to not realize it wasn’t on his finger. He slowly set me down. I had known something was wrong, but now my worst fears were coming true.
“Dana…” My dad stepped forward.
“No!”
I cringed at the volume, but my dad’s face stayed cold.
“No, Harry!” her voice rose. “Do you know where I found this?” She shook the ring at him. “Why? Why Harry?!” Tears went streaming down her face.
He took another step forward. “But Ev---“
She gritted her teeth and never took her eyes off of him. “She’s old enough to know the truth!” Mom spat. More tears spilled down her cheeks.
My dad’s face turned grave. “Go to your room.” I knew he was speaking to me, but I didn’t budge. I wouldn’t! “Evelyn,” he warned, but my feet stayed rooted to the spot. My mistake was letting a single tear fall down my cheek. “Go!” he snapped, tearing his eyes away from my mom. I stepped backward and my mom gave me a look of pity. Her face was so sad. She looked so dead. I knew the life I had was ending, but I ran up the stairs anyway. I couldn’t look at either of them any longer. I stopped at the top of the stairs, hiding behind the bit of wall that kept me from their view. I wanted to run to my room, but my exhaustion caused me to collapse there, just out of their view. I laid there and sobbed, as the yelling behind me grew louder.

She knew.
She knew now. And there was nothing I could do about it. She'd found the one weak spot I could never mask. The one that had taken so long to heal, but could still be torn open so easily. Now she knew just where to hit me whenever she felt like torturing me.
But it wouldn't be too much fun for her. After the initial pain, I just laid there, still and quiet. After a while, I guess she grew bored and I was allowed back into my own body again. The spasms had stopped, and now I just felt numb and empty. I could feel all the changes that had taken place inside of me. And I felt...cold. It was like someone had rubbed peppermint into all my pores. It was refreshing at first, but then washed over my body like frostbite. The nostalgic feel of peppermint soon turned into icicles boring into my pores and then racing down my still-miraculously-intact blood vessels.
I let loose a horrid scream just before the frost bubbled up into my throat. In a moment, Valerie was towering over me. I painfully turned my eyes up to meet hers. Somehow, hers seemed even more dangerous than before. They were dark and menacing. I couldn't see any fiery flecks in them. I still didn't know what that meant, but I had learned to associate the monster with that eye colour.
Without thinking, I scrambled backward, forgetting that I was lying completely flat. The wall just behind my head reminded me of that with a disapproving knock to my skull. I could feel the hard hit, but unlike before there was no pain with it. I knew I had hit my head, but that was about it. I didn't have time to think about this before Valerie quickly reclaimed my attention. Her sharp nails dug into my shoulders, and this time I did feel pain. In fact, I even felt droplets of cold blood slowly roll down my shoulders. Wait, cold...? Shouldn't my blood be warm? I suddenly heard the sound of frantic sniffing before Valerie's face quickly changing from fierce to relieved.
“Oh, thank God....” she sighed, “You're almost changed.” I didn't know what she meant, but whatever it was it made the blackness in her eyes soften a bit. However, she turned fierce once more as she locked her eyes with mine. “You're going to enter the last few stages. They're going to take days, and are going to be the worst you've ever felt. But whatever you do, don't let her win. Never let her win.” She spat these words at me firmly, shaking me to emphasize her point. Did she know about the creature inside my mind, too? And what did she mean by stages? And changed?
I was so lost. I wanted to ask her more questions, but I couldn't speak. The frost had taken my mouth, too. I was paralyzed except for my eyes. So I did all I could do: I examined my newly-detailed surroundings. Everything seemed so much clearer now. Colours were more vivid and, in a way, louder. It's hard to explain. It was as if everything I looked at was in 3D. The world seemed to pop out at me in a new way. It was hard to get used to and, if I wasn't already in enough pain, I would have had a headache. Part of me wondered if I really would, though. The knock to my head hadn't hurt at all. It seemed like the only pain I was feeling was the changes taking place inside of me. And suddenly it occurred to me that maybe that was the only pain I could feel anymore. It made sense and at the same time confused me even more. The frost was weaving itself through my brain and somehow my thoughts. Still, if it was the frost that had brought my world into such vivid focus, I didn’t mind at all. I just wished it would stop the pain. Ice was supposed to numb, right? This train of thought was only making me more and more lost, and I was slowly realizing that the more I thought the more muddied and blurry each thought became even though my vision was still detailed and perfect. This just wasn’t making any sense.
“You need to rest.” That last word seemed to amuse Valerie for some reason: I could hear the subtle laugh that escaped her lips. I saw a slight smile grace her face for the first time ever. But before I could enjoy this rare occurrence, it was gone again. In a more serious tone than before, she continued. “Prepare yourself for what’s to come. Get acquainted with your own head so that you know exactly who the ruler is in there. Thankfully, she’ll be gone for a little bit as your body turns the changes on and off, so you have time to get ready.” She spoke this like a speech she’d said many times before, rummaging through something on the other side of the room. I couldn’t see what because of the paralysis, but the the sounds weren’t frantic so I guess it wasn’t all that important. Then again, Valerie was cool, calm, and collected; more than any person I’d known. And even though she’d treated me like a disease, I secretly loved her for it. At least someone was willing to give me a reality check every once in a while. “…can’t move, so that’s the downside.” Apparently she’d been giving me more instructions while my mind had wandered off. STUPID! What if that was important?! I struggled to pay more attention. “The paralysis will last the rest of change. Could take days, could take hours. Who knows? Everyone is different.” Her voice was now bored and clearly gave away that she’d been through all this before. I’d given up on trying to understand what was going on. Whatever “change” was happening was keeping me alive, so I chose to focus on that much.
With one more bout of frantic sniffing around me, she finally took off in a hurry. Apparently she had something better to do. I wasn’t pleased with the abrupt exit, because she had left me to my thoughts, but maybe I needed this. I took this long period of time alone to mull over her words and try to mentally pinch myself.
What the heck was going on?