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Description

The last week really has been a challenge. With my hands and lower arms casted, I still need painkillers to get me through the day. I know, once the cast comes of, my hands and wrists will be completely useless to me. I`m in plastic pants and several diapers all the time now. Luke only changes me twice a day, once in the morning, and once in the evening. The sheer bulk between my legs makes it hard to walk normally. I don`t really want to go outside, because my packed diapered ass is very visible and I can`t help myself if I leak because of my casted arms. I need him to help me get dressed in the morning, and for the last few days, he only put shirts on me and let me walk around in plastic pants and diapers all day. They get so soggy I can feel the sauce I`m sitting in with every movement I make. I really miss the feeling of using the toilet by myself. Instead, I`m laying on our changing table like a helpless cripple twice a day, whilst he powders and creams my ass and helps me into new diapers. Sometimes I think I can feel my body become weaker and more crippled by the day. The wet diapers limit my movements, I stopped doing sports and my broken hands make it hard for me to do anything. When I sit down, I can feel the wetness from my diaper creep up my lower back and up the front in my diapers. Always after we change my diaper, Luke has to press out my blather for me, since it doesn`t seem to empty fully by itself. He insists on doing it after our diaper change, this way my new diapers always get soggy immediately. It scares me to know, how for the rest of my life, this will be my body. Incontinent, with useless hands and wet diapers. And I know that our journey will continue. I`m not nearly as crippled as I should be. Last week we took another important step. With my urethral stent firmly locked into my urethra and no larger complications, we decided to start a similar process on my rectum. But instead of putting in a permanent stent, Luke wants to stretch me open to the point where I will shit myself uncontrollably. I have some stretch from previous anal training. But when I saw the plugs he brought home and how inflatable they were, I got really scared. I really want this, but it`s a big step to have your openings violated like that. We agreed that from now on, I wouldn`t be allowed to take a shit on the toilet no more. Just enemas and but plugs. During our morning diaper change after I went to the toilet one last time, he whipped me clean and lubed me up carefully. Then he started inserting the plug in my ass. I soon felt lots of pain and tried to close my legs. So Luke brought out the nappy spreader pants, put me in them and continued. They kept my legs apart and half an hour later the plug was in. I could feel my rectum spasming as it tried to accommodate the intruder. I can`t get off the table with my casted hands and the spreader pants on, so Luke just let me lay there, feeding me painkillers and soothing me. About an hour later, he continued. I didn`t know, that the but plug was inflatable, and Luke started pumping it up. Only when he thought, he might cause damage to the intestinal wall did he stop. I could feel the plug all up in me. It was almost 50 cm long before we put it in, so it reached quite a bit into my belly. Luke picked me up and helped me waddle to my bed. I felt the thing move in me and the convulsions it caused in my intestines. We left it in until Saturday morning. I could only lay down on my back, pissing my diapers, legs spread apart by my spreader pants. Saturday morning, as I lay on our changing station again, Luke told me, he would help me shit now. I didn`t quite know what to make of it. He brought over all our enema equipment and hooked it up to the plug. I was confused. “The plug is hollow and has a one-way valve at the top, if we fill it up with water, it will go straight into you and you`ll carry the enema around for as long as I want”. He started pumping water into me with a small hand-made pump. Soon I felt my intestines fill up with the hand-warm water. At first, I felt relieved that it wasn`t cold, but soon I felt the pressure build and saw my tummy bulge. I begged him to stop, but he kept going until my belly was rock solid, and I could no longer even lift my own upper back of the table without great pain. The enemas will stretch and damage my intestines over time and make me more immobile. They make me look round and plump and also feel like I`m stuffed from the inside. All day I didn`t dare to move. Luke offered me several times to stand me up or lift me to our bed, but I just didn`t dare to move. I felt I couldn`t. I didn`t sleep much that night. Only on Sunday morning did my relief come. Luke put huge plastic diapers and pants under me, before carefully deflating the plug and quickly pulling it out. He managed to close the first diaper just in time before I started shitting all over myself. There seemed no end to it. I filled and filled my diapers with shit and piss without even wanting to do it. I could feel my butt swim in my diapers. A good hour later, it was all over. I felt weak and helpless. Luke helped me walk to the shower and gave me a good wash whilst I held my casted hands out of reach. I hoped he wouldn`t repeat the ordeal, but of course, he did what was necessary to make me the cripple I need to be. He put me back on the table and inserted the butt plug, just the stretching was incredibly painful let alone the enema. He removed the spreader pants and put me down on my feet. I can`t really walk and I can`t really sit, I`m that full. I`ve just been hobbling around all day, leaking into my diaper, hoping my crippeled existence was the right choice.

Description

The last week really has been a challenge. With my hands and lower arms casted, I still need painkillers to get me through the day. I know, once the cast comes of, my hands and wrists will be completely useless to me. I`m in plastic pants and several diapers all the time now. Luke only changes me twice a day, once in the morning, and once in the evening. The sheer bulk between my legs makes it hard to walk normally. I don`t really want to go outside, because my packed diapered ass is very visible and I can`t help myself if I leak because of my casted arms. I need him to help me get dressed in the morning, and for the last few days, he only put shirts on me and let me walk around in plastic pants and diapers all day. They get so soggy I can feel the sauce I`m sitting in with every movement I make. I really miss the feeling of using the toilet by myself. Instead, I`m laying on our changing table like a helpless cripple twice a day, whilst he powders and creams my ass and helps me into new diapers. Sometimes I think I can feel my body become weaker and more crippled by the day. The wet diapers limit my movements, I stopped doing sports and my broken hands make it hard for me to do anything. When I sit down, I can feel the wetness from my diaper creep up my lower back and up the front in my diapers. Always after we change my diaper, Luke has to press out my blather for me, since it doesn`t seem to empty fully by itself. He insists on doing it after our diaper change, this way my new diapers always get soggy immediately. It scares me to know, how for the rest of my life, this will be my body. Incontinent, with useless hands and wet diapers. And I know that our journey will continue. I`m not nearly as crippled as I should be. Last week we took another important step. With my urethral stent firmly locked into my urethra and no larger complications, we decided to start a similar process on my rectum. But instead of putting in a permanent stent, Luke wants to stretch me open to the point where I will shit myself uncontrollably. I have some stretch from previous anal training. But when I saw the plugs he brought home and how inflatable they were, I got really scared. I really want this, but it`s a big step to have your openings violated like that. We agreed that from now on, I wouldn`t be allowed to take a shit on the toilet no more. Just enemas and but plugs. During our morning diaper change after I went to the toilet one last time, he whipped me clean and lubed me up carefully. Then he started inserting the plug in my ass. I soon felt lots of pain and tried to close my legs. So Luke brought out the nappy spreader pants, put me in them and continued. They kept my legs apart and half an hour later the plug was in. I could feel my rectum spasming as it tried to accommodate the intruder. I can`t get off the table with my casted hands and the spreader pants on, so Luke just let me lay there, feeding me painkillers and soothing me. About an hour later, he continued. I didn`t know, that the but plug was inflatable, and Luke started pumping it up. Only when he thought, he might cause damage to the intestinal wall did he stop. I could feel the plug all up in me. It was almost 50 cm long before we put it in, so it reached quite a bit into my belly. Luke picked me up and helped me waddle to my bed. I felt the thing move in me and the convulsions it caused in my intestines. We left it in until Saturday morning. I could only lay down on my back, pissing my diapers, legs spread apart by my spreader pants. Saturday morning, as I lay on our changing station again, Luke told me, he would help me shit now. I didn`t quite know what to make of it. He brought over all our enema equipment and hooked it up to the plug. I was confused. “The plug is hollow and has a one-way valve at the top, if we fill it up with water, it will go straight into you and you`ll carry the enema around for as long as I want”. He started pumping water into me with a small hand-made pump. Soon I felt my intestines fill up with the hand-warm water. At first, I felt relieved that it wasn`t cold, but soon I felt the pressure build and saw my tummy bulge. I begged him to stop, but he kept going until my belly was rock solid, and I could no longer even lift my own upper back of the table without great pain. The enemas will stretch and damage my intestines over time and make me more immobile. They make me look round and plump and also feel like I`m stuffed from the inside. All day I didn`t dare to move. Luke offered me several times to stand me up or lift me to our bed, but I just didn`t dare to move. I felt I couldn`t. I didn`t sleep much that night. Only on Sunday morning did my relief come. Luke put huge plastic diapers and pants under me, before carefully deflating the plug and quickly pulling it out. He managed to close the first diaper just in time before I started shitting all over myself. There seemed no end to it. I filled and filled my diapers with shit and piss without even wanting to do it. I could feel my butt swim in my diapers. A good hour later, it was all over. I felt weak and helpless. Luke helped me walk to the shower and gave me a good wash whilst I held my casted hands out of reach. I hoped he wouldn`t repeat the ordeal, but of course, he did what was necessary to make me the cripple I need to be. He put me back on the table and inserted the butt plug, just the stretching was incredibly painful let alone the enema. He removed the spreader pants and put me down on my feet. I can`t really walk and I can`t really sit, I`m that full. I`ve just been hobbling around all day, leaking into my diaper, hoping my crippeled existence was the right choice.