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Albertonykus β Ceratopsians are Not Dinosaurs
Published: 2010-05-02 00:57:13 +0000 UTC; Views: 5709; Favourites: 11; Downloads: 34
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There's no way ceratopsians are dinosaurs! They are much too different! Ceratopsians have a rostral bone and horn-shaped jugals, dinosaurs don't! Besides, they've existed as two separate branches since the Jurassic! Okay, I acknowledge the fact that ceratopsians were descended from dinosaurs, but that doesn't make them dinosaurs; I think they've diverged far enough to not be dinosaurs, thereby proving that I fail biology forever because nothing is ever a different group from its ancestors! We don't say dinosaurs have horns, we say ceratopsians have horns; we don't say vertebrates have horns, either, but I think ceratopsians are vertebrates but not dinosaurs for... no good reason! Sure, all paleontologists except the CAND (Ceratopsians Are Not Dinosaurs) crowd (who at least try to justify themselves by claiming the paraphyly of Dinosauria) agree that ceratopsians are dinosaurs because they fit in the definition of Dinosauria (Passer domesticus, Triceratops horridus, their concestor, and all descendants of that concestor), a ceratopsian (Triceratops horridus) is even used as a specifier in the definition, and what I've said doesn't even violate that definition, but I still don't think ceratopsians are dinosaurs, because I can shape the definition of dinosaur to fit whatever I want even though I can't! (I think pterosaurs are dinosaurs!)Related content
Comments: 57
I hope not! I made them up for the sake of this satire.
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Science doesn't just latch onto whatever feels good and hope it will be right in the end. Science isn't done by saying "I want pterosaurs to be dinosaurs" or " X isn't a dinosaur because It looks weird to me".
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Uh... you realize I'm being satirical, right?
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Those new style ceratopsid hands are freaky. Is it proven that the outer fingers didn't reach the ground?
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They are, though this was my first attempt at them so they might not be a good representation (even for a cartoon). The outer fingers not touching the ground appears to be real though; it's described in this study on an articulated Triceratops hand.
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The last sentence should be "I think pterosaurs, marine reptiles, basal synapsids & Pleistocene mammals are dinosaurs, but not silesaurids & lagerpetonids!".
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Right. XD
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Awesome, but aren't Megalosaurus bucklandii and Iguanodon bernissartensis the specifiers for Dinosauria?
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Depends on who you ask; until PhyloCode comes out most definitions are more or less just placeholders. They currently denote the same group anyway.
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well correction my friend what makes a dinosaur?
a dinosaur must have all these features
is legs positioned pointing down like an elephant than a crocodile
fingers less than 4
vertibrae fused to the hipbone
front legs shorter than hind legs
needs to be warm blooded
there more features that makes a dinosaur and a triceratops has all these features so do birds. i think. well nice picture : D i like it i admire your work cute drawing too : D
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Brachiosaurus actually had a giraffe-like build with longer forelimbs.
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yeah that info. came from an out of date dinosaur encyclopedia book
that is a pop-up book but i have new encyclopedia's thank's anyway.
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First of all, I'm not being serious. This is a satirical parody.
Also, most dinosaurs have five-fingered hands. A dinosaur is Passer domesticus, Triceratops horridus, their latest common ancestor and all of that ancestor's descendants, but those are the diagnostic features we'd expect to be basal for dinosaurs. Thanks though!
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The extreme and only true opinion is: Ceratopsians and all other Ornithischia are Dinosaurs while Saurischia are in fact Birds.
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Wha-? No, no, no, you've got it all mixed up. Saurischians are dinosaurs, and most ornithischians aren't! Haven't you read any NANIAG (Neornithischians Are Not In Actuality Genasaurs) papers? XD
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You are joking! If Sauropods are not Birds, than I'm not Mammal. Oh yes, come and join the HANSM (Humans are not stupid Mammals)!
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Where are you getting all this? Birds are sauropods, not the other way around! Ever heard of BCF (Brachiosaurids Come First)?
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This is straight ridicolous. Everybody knows that every animal is a Beardog. WAAA (We are all Amphicyons) [link]
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You're misinterpreting. It's We Are All Alvarezsauroids! Yeah! (But in the end, everything's a chicken! A chicken, I tell ya! [link] )
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Eh? Everyone knows it's WAAO (We Are All Oviraptorosaurs)! Any NANIAM (Nemegtosaurids Are Not In Actually Macronarians) paper could tell you that! Haven't you heard of SCF (Spinosaurids Came First)?!?
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Hogwash.
Were did you get such poorly researched information? Isn't it obvious that HAIAP (Humans Are In Actuality Pterosaurs) is the best?
We branched off from Pterodactyloidea when Archicebus' ancestors evolved! Even though we haven't technically found any, it's obvious there was at least one. ArchicebusΒ and co. most likely had fur that were homologs to pycno-fibers which eventually led to our hair? Therefore, we are members of Pterosauria!
NANIAM is right on the non-macronarian nemegtosaurid stuff, but WAAO is BS. SCF is right too though. Almost. It is obvious that NyasasaurusΒ is a basal coelophysoid and that G.S.P's spinosaurid = coelophysoid theory is clearlyΒ true due to their subnarial gap! You can obviously see thatΒ NHMUKΒ R6856 and SAM-PK-K10654's materials do NOT consist of skulls, yet there known skeletal remains is clearly identicalΒ to that of Coelophysis!
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And you're wrong about MANIAC: it's actually Megaraptorans Are Not In Actuality Carnosaurs!
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The ironic part is that one Wikipedia article (I believe it was the one on the Rebbachisauridae) implies that the NANIAM actually exists...
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Ok! I can live with this truth Gagakgagak!
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Haha. I thought this was serious for a minute. XD
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I could read your sarcastic satire whole week nonstop. This is pure genius.
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I loled at the entire description, nice parody.
And the dromaeosaur in the drawing is undeniably cute.
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Thanks! Much of it was based on a real online debate I had shortly before finishing this. (Though I got the idea somewhat earlier than that.)
I must say I'm particularly pleased with the dromaeosaurid myself.
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Mark: Oh, I get it, your making fun of something, but what is it!
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I'm making fun of those who think birds aren't dinosaurs for no good reason. (Probably because there isn't a good reason). By the same reasoning I can "prove" that ceratopsians aren't dinosaurs.
(Note, however, this is different from the BAND, which are professional paleontologists who don't think birds evolved from dinosaurs. There aren't many of them but they are very vocal and have good agents, it seems, which is why they can always get their laughable ideas published. But they'll wait for another time...)
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Will we get a BAND parody soon?
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I haven't planned a parody, though I might now that you bring it up. I do want to write a blog post about BAND eventually, but don't expect it anytime soon. I also had plans for a Raptormaniacs comic making fun of BAND, but scrapped it because it was overly pointed and blatant.
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Interesting....what sort of comment inspired you to make this? Or did you just think it up?
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I've been thinking about it since I finished the terror bird one, but this was the last straw: [link]
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Glad you liked the joke.
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