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babynips99 — Mirage
Published: 2012-07-25 02:57:36 +0000 UTC; Views: 106; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 0
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Description
The sticks intertwine,two at a time,
two-hundred at a time.
My brain is squeezed
my head feels diseased,
as I scream out for help.
My flowing red locks,
cover my body,
I try to shake myself awake.
In the distance,
my name is called,
but I am falling.
My eyes will not open,
and my head becomes broke,
my lashes are fangs.
I scream louder,
like thunder,
heard by a muffled voice.
I shake harder,
is it my father?
no, it is not.
At last,
my eyes flutter open,
and the world is ashen.
A light is in front of me,
it's white, green, and lovely,
as I see a face,
a face that brought me into this world.
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Comments: 6
I know nothing about poetry, but this one is my favourite of the ones you have here. Nice work
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thank you 
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You're welcome, keep up the great work!
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You write... so mysteriously as if you are challenging the reader. Sometimes I think that you enjoy leading people to an untrue conclusion if only because it amuses you or heightens the mystery.
I like your styles... although you could be a professional writer trying to ridicule the rest of us 
Whatever it is....keep going
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