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babynips99 — Trapped in Lies
Published: 2012-09-22 16:36:33 +0000 UTC; Views: 88; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 1
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Description Underneath the lies,
is where you will find the secrets.
Underneath the secrets,
is where you will see deep dark inside.
The deepest of secrets can be found in the most open places,
you must find what lies beneath.

A secret door to a garden,
a vine fighting its way through the weeds.
A cobweb covering rotten remains,
a spider spinning its web.

Deep within the lies there is truth.
Deep within the secrets is a tree wanting to grow.
But the key to the door is lost,
and no one can find it,
even the ones who look beneath the lies.
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Comments: 5

ALBDreamweaver [2012-10-05 03:41:07 +0000 UTC]

No, actually I don't. Not that it's not an excellent poem, I just can't see it's cadence working lyrically.

<3 though.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

babynips99 In reply to ALBDreamweaver [2012-10-05 03:46:13 +0000 UTC]

thanks ya i don't know about it being a song. just wanted to see what people thought

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

ALBDreamweaver In reply to babynips99 [2012-10-05 04:05:09 +0000 UTC]

Well, I really do like it, just not as a song

And don't thank me, you wrote it. It's merits are yours, not mine.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

littlebear1998 [2012-10-01 12:09:34 +0000 UTC]

I defiantly think you could turn this into a song, maybe a few more verses ect but yeah! I like the idea of this poem, I also like that it has a lot of imagery!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

babynips99 In reply to littlebear1998 [2012-10-01 23:58:14 +0000 UTC]

Thank you so much! Let me know if you have any ideas

👍: 0 ⏩: 0