HOME | DD
Ddriana β C+H: Dating tips with Commander Shepard
Published: 2012-05-07 09:43:13 +0000 UTC; Views: 22988; Favourites: 398; Downloads: 116
Redirect to original
Description
Shepard, I may be a socially awkward penguin but even I can see that some of your moves are, uh, not optimal.Shepard and dating. It can quickly get really, really awkward. Especially when the dialogue wheel doesn't tell you what, or even how, you are really going to say. Either you wish to say that you are good friends (Kaidan) and Shepard suddenly goes all Lannister twins on you, or you merely want to get to know Jacob and oh dear lord, the voice actress is really flirting, it didn't say it was flirting, I don't want to flirt, what do I do?! D: Made even more awkward by the fact that Mass Effect makes me want to be 100% faithful to Garrus so... yeah. Awkward XD
The Garrus thing you can choose at least, and thank god for that. The idea of losing on purpose to feed my boyfriend's ego is unacceptable (to be fair, Garrus doesn't have a hissy fit if he doesn't win).
Also, a pretend loss is insulting.
Champions and Heroes is a collaboration with and her perfectly good aim, and can also be found here championsandheroes.smackjeeves⦠and on tumblr championsandheroes.tumblr.com/
All hail Bioware.
Related content
Comments: 132
Thank you. I always did find that sudden shift in conversation very awkward XD
π: 0 β©: 0
I think Bioware shipped FemShep + Garrus.
π: 0 β©: 1
That... is quite likely, yes.
π: 0 β©: 0
Finally! Someone who agrees! I didn't let him win either.
π: 0 β©: 1
Garrus is a big boy. Deep down he knows that I am a horrible shot (it's true...) and that he has been spotting and killing enemies before I can locate them since ME1 (sadly, also true, I'm not sure what I'd do without him). *Pretty sure* no target practice competition can undo that for him XD
π: 0 β©: 1
For me it was mostly about pride. I played as an Infiltrator. I absolutely loved to use the sniper rifles, so it was a matter of professional pride. And no boyfriend of mine was gonna take that from me! Even if said boyfriend was Garrus.
He most definitely knew that, too. He did it just for my ego, I'll bet.
Isn't he the most awesome guy ever?
π: 0 β©: 0
HAHAHAHA!! I don't think I have ever laughed harder than this! This is genius!
π: 0 β©: 1
YEAH! But still less awkward, than Hawke hitting on Anders: "Oh... I see you have some issues with that creepy revenge spirit of yours but damn... you do look nice!" WTF?
or on Fenris: "You were an dreadfully abused slave? Well you certainly got some working out..."
One does not simply start flirting in such situations...
π: 0 β©: 1
"Shepard, I may be a socially awkward penguin but even I can see that some of your moves are, uh, not optimal.
"
I laughed loud with this! hahahaha
π: 0 β©: 1
I loved flirting with Joker..kind of awkward. He didn't even mention Garrus! Though with my FemShep it's always good natured ribbing when it deals with Joker. Although...cushions and gel-packs....
π: 0 β©: 1
The only flirting with Joker I got was a "... uh, oh, I never even thought of that". Friendzoned XD
π: 0 β©: 2
To me he said something along the lines of how he'd follow me anywhere except to my bedroom. But EDI...EDI....
π: 0 β©: 1
Haha, that is a pretty smooth way to turn you down XD
π: 0 β©: 1
yeah...an A.I. in a robot body that could kill him...or a female biotic that could kill him...not the greatest of options! XD
π: 0 β©: 1
To be fair, his brittle bone disease isn't likely to kill him during sex. Granted, EDI and Shepard are both ladies who ought to make any man hesitate just a little XD
π: 0 β©: 1
To paraphrase Phineas Flynn yes yes they are.
π: 0 β©: 0
Though hearing Garrus yell, "I'm Garrus Vakarian and this is now my favorite spot on the Citadel." Makes me forgive the big lug. Oh Garrus I'd date you despite the chafing.
π: 0 β©: 1
Pretty sure we could all deal with a bit of chafing XD
π: 0 β©: 1
I'll even deal with accidental ingestion...wait a minute...*thinks* I don't know if even intentional can happen....last...crap the future lemon in my fic will be ruined!
π: 0 β©: 1
I fear Mordin will always be a required presence in my life for this to work out. Which would be a total win, because, you know, Mordin.
π: 0 β©: 1
*nods nods* Mordin...*Sigh* at least you went out singing my friend. God speed.
π: 0 β©: 0
Summed it up perfectly. Kaidan in me1, Jacob in me2 and Vega (...yeah its just that all fem sheps are a little slutty right?) the whole thing just managed to make me feel quite uncomfortable. "Shepard! I believed you where the ultimate paragon! LIES!! You damn whore!!!"
π: 0 β©: 1
Haha, I played renegade, and I normally play flirty as all hell but... there's something about Shepard that makes that feel wrong. Which makes the forced flirting even worse to me :I
π: 0 β©: 0
Comander Shepard , arkward romance, loudsy dancer, your worst nightmare driver since 2183 CE
π: 0 β©: 1
And somehow the Savior of the Galaxy too. Min-maxing, I suspect XD
π: 0 β©: 0
LOL yeah in ME2 I was like "...I think being dead for 2 years has done things to Shepard's libido, she needs sex like, right now." XD
π: 0 β©: 1
The sneaky plan of the illusive man?
π: 0 β©: 1
Probablythe same reason he upped her cup-size.
π: 0 β©: 1
The first time I missed because Garrus was wuv and the second time I missed because of character development reasons for Sheperd. Garrus totally knew she missed on purpose the second time (come on, she's an Infiltrator) though.
π: 0 β©: 1
Haha, I refuse to miss. I have my pride, and Garrus has seen me trying to snipe in battle. I play vanguard and I'm horrible at aiming but think sniping is great fun... he knows it was a lucky shot XD
π: 0 β©: 0
Yup, when the option came up I made Garrus swallow his pride!
π: 0 β©: 0
Jacob was weird for everyone. It's the abs, man. Yu don't want to flirt BUT THEY MAKE IT HAPPEN ANYWAY. THEY'RE MAGIC.
π: 0 β©: 1
Aha! The connection between Jacob and Vega! The muscles! That is the reason you cannot avoid flirting with them
π: 0 β©: 0
Pahhahahahaha! This is painfully true and hilarious.
Can't argue with her results though.
π: 0 β©: 1
XD The timing with Thane was always weird, but the whole "friendship is a start" thing smoothed the transition just a bit. Which is enough for me!
It gave me goosebumps when he first calls you "Siha."
=
π: 0 β©: 1
Hoho, I never actually played his romance, but I did start a new playthrough to do that. Right before ME3 came out and... ending. Haven't been able to continue :I
And even so... what I really want to do is to play a 'black widow' Shepard who dates someone new in every game, and their partner always dies. I think it would make a glorious story XD
π: 0 β©: 1
My precious Thane died because I chose the wrong characters for the final mission! I couldn't take it! It was so dramatic and sad the way he was carried away by the swarm...
So I restarted the mission and made sure they all survived, lol!
π: 0 β©: 1
Haha, and that's why you've got save files XD
π: 0 β©: 0
| Next =>