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Description
Deidara had done it at last. He'd done the impossible, and had become his art. His glorious, beautiful art! And now he was forever a part of it, safe in that knowledge.

And he had taken down Uchiha Sasuke as well...but that wasn't nearly as important as his art. (It if was Itachi, it may have come close.)

But death...wasn't exactly what he expected. The blonde stood in front of the large, golden gates, shocked into silence for one of the few times in his life. He knew that shinobi gods had to be rather lenient (otherwise no one would get up there)...but Deidara?! An Akatsuki member, going to heaven?! It was laughable.

In fact, the artist would've gone into hysterics, had it not been for the rather impatient man with a large book and even larger wings, suddenly standing beside him and clearing his throat loudly. Deidara jumped away from him, reaching down for a kunai--and finding that he had none. The surprised shinobi's gaze turned downward, and he found himself with none of his weapons--and no medium for his art! No more clay! He could've sworn that he had at least a little left when sacrificing himself for his art!

"Ahem." The winged man cleared his throat again, looking bored. "Deidara, I presume? Ugh, shinobi..."

"Yeah, I'm Deidara." He said suspiciously. He'd been in more bizarre genjutsu like this, and the Uchiha clan was infamous for their genjutsu abilities.

"Well...nice going. You went and died and now you're up here, miraculously." The man stated, and cracked open his massive book.

"Uh, hello?! I'm an Akatsuki member, darkest organization of our time, un? I've killed and murdered and massacred and once worshiped a heathen god with Hidan--why the hell am I up here, un?!" He planted his fists on his hips, spotting the immediate hole in the plan.

Yet again, the winged man cleared his throat. It was starting to get annoying. "I am aware of your past actions." He didn't look up, just kept his eyes glued on the many pages of his book.

"So why am I up here?! Un."

"Because you apologized." He replied simply, as if it was obvious.

That left Deidara nonplussed. He'd apologized...? Yeah, he had...to Tobi, and that was just because he'd thought he killed the annoying little masked nin as well. "I wasn't--"

"It doesn't matter. Unless, of course, you'd rather go somewhere else...?" The man looked up, raising his eyebrow with a flat look. Hastily, the blonde shook his head. "So then...we just need a bit of paperwork before you can go in."

"Paperwork? I thought this was paradise, un. Why would there be such a horrible thing as paperwork?" Deidara made a face, but was now utterly convinced that he had, in fact, kicked the bucket.

The winged one sighed, as if he'd long wondered the same exact thing.

Deciding to change the subject, Deidara asked, "So...a guy named Hidan make it up here? Un?"

"No. Jashinists go to a different place, neither heaven nor hell." He responded, turning the page.

"Hah, that'd make sense. What about Kakuzu?"

"No. His greed cast him down into hell."

"Don't you guys ever take into account how many murders have been done?"

"...For civilians."

Deidara chuckled, and sighed happily. "At least I beat those jerks up here. So I'm the second Akatsuki member to go up here, un. Looks like Danna beat me yet again..."

"I take it you mean Sasori?" The man asked, continuing to leaf through his tome.

"Yeah, un. He wasn't greedy or worshiped a heathen god, so he's up here, right?" Deidara asked uneasily. Sasori had been a nice enough guy, and if they weren't counting murders it was a sure-fire thing that he made it up into paradise...right? The blonde shifted uncomfortably, not liking the pitying look the winged man was giving him.

"I'm sorry, Deidara...Sasori isn't here. You're the first of your group to make it up here, and will possibly be the only one." He said quietly, sounding like he was genuinely sorry for the Iwa-nin.

"...What?" Deidara asked, smiling. "Sasori-danna was an angel. He even looked like one, un. If you aren't counting how many people we've killed, then he should be up here." He continued smiling, until a pause later, it turned into a snarl and he shouted, "So why the hell isn't he up here?!"

"Sasori had the ability to stop the attack that killed him. Since he didn't...it was classified as a suicide."

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU CALL MY DEATH THEN?!" He yelled, wishing dearly for some of his clay right then. If he couldn't be with Sasori, or at least someone else, what was the point of being up here?! Anywhere else would at least be fun and companionable.

"You were trying to take out Uchiha Sasuke as well. Your death was classified as a kamikaze attack." The winged man explained wearily, looking stressed.

"Wait--trying to take him out? You mean I didn't even kill him...?" For supposedly being paradise, this place just kept getting worse and worse.

"It wasn't his time to go. Sasuke will join you shortly up here, however, unless he does something unforgiveable."

Deidara had had enough. Not only had he learned that he'd just died in vain, but no one else was up here to talk to! Not even his danna! "Why...?!"

((~ToMigeWithLove 's attempt: [link] ))

Description
Deidara had done it at last. He'd done the impossible, and had become his art. His glorious, beautiful art! And now he was forever a part of it, safe in that knowledge.

And he had taken down Uchiha Sasuke as well...but that wasn't nearly as important as his art. (It if was Itachi, it may have come close.)

But death...wasn't exactly what he expected. The blonde stood in front of the large, golden gates, shocked into silence for one of the few times in his life. He knew that shinobi gods had to be rather lenient (otherwise no one would get up there)...but Deidara?! An Akatsuki member, going to heaven?! It was laughable.

In fact, the artist would've gone into hysterics, had it not been for the rather impatient man with a large book and even larger wings, suddenly standing beside him and clearing his throat loudly. Deidara jumped away from him, reaching down for a kunai--and finding that he had none. The surprised shinobi's gaze turned downward, and he found himself with none of his weapons--and no medium for his art! No more clay! He could've sworn that he had at least a little left when sacrificing himself for his art!

"Ahem." The winged man cleared his throat again, looking bored. "Deidara, I presume? Ugh, shinobi..."

"Yeah, I'm Deidara." He said suspiciously. He'd been in more bizarre genjutsu like this, and the Uchiha clan was infamous for their genjutsu abilities.

"Well...nice going. You went and died and now you're up here, miraculously." The man stated, and cracked open his massive book.

"Uh, hello?! I'm an Akatsuki member, darkest organization of our time, un? I've killed and murdered and massacred and once worshiped a heathen god with Hidan--why the hell am I up here, un?!" He planted his fists on his hips, spotting the immediate hole in the plan.

Yet again, the winged man cleared his throat. It was starting to get annoying. "I am aware of your past actions." He didn't look up, just kept his eyes glued on the many pages of his book.

"So why am I up here?! Un."

"Because you apologized." He replied simply, as if it was obvious.

That left Deidara nonplussed. He'd apologized...? Yeah, he had...to Tobi, and that was just because he'd thought he killed the annoying little masked nin as well. "I wasn't--"

"It doesn't matter. Unless, of course, you'd rather go somewhere else...?" The man looked up, raising his eyebrow with a flat look. Hastily, the blonde shook his head. "So then...we just need a bit of paperwork before you can go in."

"Paperwork? I thought this was paradise, un. Why would there be such a horrible thing as paperwork?" Deidara made a face, but was now utterly convinced that he had, in fact, kicked the bucket.

The winged one sighed, as if he'd long wondered the same exact thing.

Deciding to change the subject, Deidara asked, "So...a guy named Hidan make it up here? Un?"

"No. Jashinists go to a different place, neither heaven nor hell." He responded, turning the page.

"Hah, that'd make sense. What about Kakuzu?"

"No. His greed cast him down into hell."

"Don't you guys ever take into account how many murders have been done?"

"...For civilians."

Deidara chuckled, and sighed happily. "At least I beat those jerks up here. So I'm the second Akatsuki member to go up here, un. Looks like Danna beat me yet again..."

"I take it you mean Sasori?" The man asked, continuing to leaf through his tome.

"Yeah, un. He wasn't greedy or worshiped a heathen god, so he's up here, right?" Deidara asked uneasily. Sasori had been a nice enough guy, and if they weren't counting murders it was a sure-fire thing that he made it up into paradise...right? The blonde shifted uncomfortably, not liking the pitying look the winged man was giving him.

"I'm sorry, Deidara...Sasori isn't here. You're the first of your group to make it up here, and will possibly be the only one." He said quietly, sounding like he was genuinely sorry for the Iwa-nin.

"...What?" Deidara asked, smiling. "Sasori-danna was an angel. He even looked like one, un. If you aren't counting how many people we've killed, then he should be up here." He continued smiling, until a pause later, it turned into a snarl and he shouted, "So why the hell isn't he up here?!"

"Sasori had the ability to stop the attack that killed him. Since he didn't...it was classified as a suicide."

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU CALL MY DEATH THEN?!" He yelled, wishing dearly for some of his clay right then. If he couldn't be with Sasori, or at least someone else, what was the point of being up here?! Anywhere else would at least be fun and companionable.

"You were trying to take out Uchiha Sasuke as well. Your death was classified as a kamikaze attack." The winged man explained wearily, looking stressed.

"Wait--trying to take him out? You mean I didn't even kill him...?" For supposedly being paradise, this place just kept getting worse and worse.

"It wasn't his time to go. Sasuke will join you shortly up here, however, unless he does something unforgiveable."

Deidara had had enough. Not only had he learned that he'd just died in vain, but no one else was up here to talk to! Not even his danna! "Why...?!"

((~ToMigeWithLove 's attempt: [link] ))