HOME | DD
Published: 2004-02-29 18:44:45 +0000 UTC; Views: 146; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 46
Redirect to original
Description
Before tonight I had nothing,now I have too much
My kiss is poison,
I kill everything I touch
If the tears don't fall so sudden,
doesn't mean the feelings are any less real
Once so vonourable and passionate,
now unable to feel
Recreate me as the past
Put a band aid over this broken heart
Put the tape in and press rewind
Watch it from the start
Watch me slowly - slowly drown
Watch me
Tease me
Stop
Related content
Comments: 8
xTarnishedHalox [2004-03-14 17:53:35 +0000 UTC]
WA-HA! I am loving this. All I can think about as I read this poem is how it would sound so great at a poetry slam, read aloud. The ending stanza, the addition of symbolism from the Tape-recorder/CD-player thing is absolutly amazing.
The rhyming in the first two stanzas are joined together and form very nicely together. Although, you mispelled vulnerable, (If that's what vonourable is supposed to be.) It's an all together great peice.
Great job.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
flutter-of-wings In reply to xTarnishedHalox [2004-03-14 18:10:24 +0000 UTC]
thank you!!!!!! you're too kind. yeah i'm not much of a speller heh, although i was sure that's how you spelt it...hmmm never the less thanky for the wonderfull comments and teaching me how to spell!
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
PhoeNix-iGnitioN [2004-03-01 05:38:31 +0000 UTC]
Hey..thats pretty cool..sounds like everythin has fallen to peices?..i'm listen to blink anthem II
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
flutter-of-wings In reply to PhoeNix-iGnitioN [2004-03-01 09:45:11 +0000 UTC]
hehe, that's such an awesome song!
yeah everything has fallen to peices!
xxx
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
xdeusx [2004-03-01 02:31:43 +0000 UTC]
I like the last 3 lines a lot, it really gives it that extra umph
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
BakeACake [2004-02-29 20:05:42 +0000 UTC]
i really like this alot. i like how its set up. and its really good.!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
flutter-of-wings In reply to BakeACake [2004-02-29 21:54:28 +0000 UTC]
wow, thank you! that means a lot to me
take care
xxx
👍: 0 ⏩: 0