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JuanaSunfall — That Post
Published: 2019-05-31 16:01:34 +0000 UTC; Views: 4650; Favourites: 87; Downloads: 0
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There was that amazing post about Harry waking up sometime after the battle, getting a message from Snape at 3.am ; a pic of him in a hospital bed and the text "i lived bitch."I needed to do this. XD
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its The best medicine, of course.
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And I have the fanfic that *saved* him — THIS IS SO GOOD
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This is awesome. He would so do this, just so Harry could get him if he was absolutely needed and so that Harry would not have to feel guilty.
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Next message be like
3:03am “Potter”
3:03am “Potter”
3:04am “POTTER”
harry: “WHAT”
snape: “did I wake you up?”
harry: “YES.”
snape: “good.”
snape: “i need someone to get me out of here.”
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Or perhaps:
3:03am “Potter”
3:03am “Potter”
3:04am “POTTER”
harry: “WHAT?"
snape: "You're a dunderhead. Turn off your phone and go back to sleep."
Besides, Severus is safely tucked away in a muggle hospital on a different continent, and Harry will NEVER find him.
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And because he’s on a different continent with a different time it’s daytime for him so he can take to annoying Dunderheads in England as a pleasant distraction.
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Harry: "No."
Snape: "What do you mean 'No'?"
Harry: "You still have a neck brace!!! That is what I mean by 'No'."
Snape: "So? I want out."
Harry: "You idiot, you still need to heal more."
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Snape: “soooo...”
harry: „what.“
snape: „technically you say I need to be in a bed and have someone around to help in an emergency.“
Harry: „yes.“
snape: „Potter?“
harry: „I‘m AWAKE. WHAT IS IT.“
snape: „you do have a guestroom, don’t you?“
Harry: “yes...”
snape: “with a nice, comfy bed?”
harry: “...yes.”
harry:”wait. WAIT.”
snape: “come on, potter. I almost died for you.”
harry: “THATS NOT A FAIR ARGUMENT!”
snape: “all the years i spent in danger and agony and not a word of thanks... such a cruel world indeed...”
harry: “SIGH. I’m on my way. Hold on.”
snape: “excellent.”
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Snape: "Do you even know where I am?"
Harry: ". . . no."
Snape: "Sigh. I could have sworn I beat logic into that hard head of yours."
Harry: "No, that was Hermione. That was what you were trying to do?"
Snape: "Obviously. . . Anyhow here is my location:"(location sent)
Harry: "Really. Just, Really?! Did you have to use that word?"
Snape: "Yes, yes I did. Now hurry up Potter."
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Snape:”oh, and Potter?”
harry: „What is it now?“
Snape: „I need fresh clothing. I’m in a hospital gown and my robes are blood-soaked.“
Harry: „noted.“
*Snape is typing
Harry: „oh for heavens Sake!“
Snape: “when you’re on your way, would you stop by a store and get me some bagels? Food here is abysmal.”
Harry: ”REALLY?!”
Snape: “Potter, I’m hurt and lonely and cold and hungry. But if providing me with some decent food after months i spent unable to keep down anything due to immense stress is too much to ask...”
Harry: “OK, OK, I GET IT. jeez you’re good at this.”
Snape: “I know.”
Harry: “Bagels with cream and salmon okay?”
Snape: “Sufficient.”
Harry: “SIGH. I’ll see you in a moment.”
Snape: “Lovely.”
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A hour later
Snape: "What's taking you so long?"
Harry: "Umm. . ."
Snape: "You splinched yourself didn't you?"
Harry: ". . . no."
Snape: "You did didn't you."
Harry: "Maybe."
Snape: "SIGH. Why am I not surprised."
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Harry: “i needed a Little detour to stop by Hermione’s for some diptam, I’ll be over in a few minutes.”
snape: “are the bagels okay?”
harry: “YOU 8(
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Snape: "You lost the bagels when you splinched didn't you?"
Harry: ". . ."
Snape: "You incompetent moron."
Harry: "Sorry. We'll pick some more up on the way back."
Snape: "We better."
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Later, at grimmault place No.12;
Harry is sitting in an armchair next to the bed in his guestroom. Snape is propped up on some pillows on the bed, munching on a bagel.
Harry stares at him.
snape: “What?”
Harry: “This is so not happening right now. This is completely insane. I don’t know if I should laugh, cry or strangle you with my bare hands.”
Snape *gives him a pitying look and hands over the box from the bakery “want a bagel?”
Harry *sobs violently
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Snape: "I guess you chose option 2."
Harry: *sniffles "It's not funny you prick."
Snape: *with a strait face "I know, I was being completely Sirius."
Both: *bursts out laughing
Snape: "I never thought I'd see the day I made a Sirius pun. God, I'm to old for this. I'm retiring, I don't want to deal with you lazy brats for the rest of my miserable life."
Harry: "Too bad, your stuck with us. Well, at least Hermione and I."
Snape: "What did I do to deserve this terrible fate?"
Harry: "You gave me your memories and then lead me to believe you were dead before texting me that you were alive, is what you did."
Both: *chuckles
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Harry: “besidessss....”
snape: “What?”
Harry: “you know that McGonagall is headmistress right now? I talked to her and she wants you to take over as soon as you’re recovered...”
Snape: “What.”
Harry: “And since she’s in charge for now she already decided that, cause they only got a substitute from the ministry and nobody wants that, after my graduation... I can come back to teach DADA.”
Snape: “WHAT?!”
Harry*smirks and lifts his bagel :”Cheers, Headmaster.”
I think we managed to create some pretty good fan fiction
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We should compile this into a story of it's own and publish it on multiple different sites and then expand on it more, I'm sure we would be able to make it into a popular story.
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Is this a yes? Because I WILL do it.
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The only thing I don't believe about this situation is wizards having invented smart phones in the 1990s. They didn't even have land-lines; they had to stick their heads in fireplaces and send photographs by owl.
And they claim to be better than us muggles! Sev is smart to have checked himself into a muggle hospital and left the wizarding world forever.
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It was one of those posts which already existed before but had been translated into an HP version I think. Nothing is to be taken seriously here. XD
I just loved the idea of sev sending such a message to Harry.
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That is sooooooo something Prof, Snape would do
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Applause, man, applause
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