HOME | DD

Description
You’d been in training for two weeks, without a single friend in the world.

In fact, after the fall of Shiganshina you really didn’t want to make any friends. First off, you were in a strange place where no-one new you, secondly you had a mission. Your mission was pretty simple, find a way to eliminate your enemy.

Quests like that don’t leave a lot of room for friendships and even less for relationships. Unlike most of your kind though, you could instantly sense others with the same ability. Of course, you would never admit that and finding time to speak with another would be difficult, at best, with so many angry people around.

Your ability? You were a titan shifter. In fact, you would change into a fourteen meter titan with (h/c) hair and (e/c) eyes. One of the rare female types, you were quite rare. You in particular were more so do to your ability to form total sentences even if you were in your titan form, which belonged to only one other. Only the great beast could speak as a titan. You had also only heard rumors of other females, never met one. You heard that a village to the south had one.

Perhaps there is only one per outworld village. You really don’t know for sure. Your other rather unique ability was the way you could link to another titan. There isn't really a good word for it.

If you touched them and wanted to, you could scan through their mind and see what they had seen or find what they know. Testing this with other shifters in your own village you learned two things: They aren't aware of it happening and you don’t have to maintain contact past brushing against them.

Back to now though. You’re sitting quietly in the corner of the mess hall again, trying to devour the nasty thing before you. You've had worse in fact, much worse. Eating humans has always been rather disgusting to you but in your titan form you have.

As for food, not everyone in your village can cook but everyone must take a turn feeding the trainees. Part of your training included resistance to torture, in part to enforce resistance to accidentally shifting. You were also trained to defend yourself, as the wrong accident could easily expose what you are.

You watched the room. Honestly you were a little shocked at the fact there were three other shifters here. They didn’t seem to notice you. You didn’t seem to mind. The quiet was somewhat refreshing but it left you with far too much time to think.

Your eyes travel to the form moving closer to you. Not who you expected to be the first to approach. You aren't sure what you expected, really. The one they call ‘Saint Krista’ wouldn't have been a surprise, or Marco, the overly friendly freckled boy. Instead it was the best friend of the shifter you had been trying to keep your eyes off of. This large, blonde man walked over to you, sitting at your mostly empty table.

This of course drew you into strangely staring at him with an uncaring, expressionless look. His friend though, was right behind him.

That taller boy, he was hard not to stare at. In fact, he was the one you had been staring at when the blonde came to sit with you. His slightly messy, short (almost black) dark chocolate hair and piercing emerald green eyes seemed to draw in your attention. The only thing you didn’t like is he is very, very tall. Then again that wasn’t the worst thing in the world.

“So, are you going to just stare at me, or would you like to do something more intimate?” The blonde said. You thought about it a moment, what was his name again. You shrug.

“I doubt you’d be able to handle yourself. Plus, until you so rudely broke my concentration I was busy staring at someone else.” Your reply brings a coughing fit of laughter from the closest table to you. “Still if you feel like occupying my table, you should both sit.”

As the other boy joins you it is all you can do not to smile. Yes, there’s something lovely about this man. Bertolt Hoover, that’s his name… Your thoughts reply quickly. You still can’t grasp the name of the blonde.

Bertolt though sits down with a shy, quiet smile. Your eyes meet his a moment before your attention is pulled away by the man sitting across from you.

“You’re just playing hard to get.” He said.

“Maybe impossible… Since I can’t even remember your name.” You say with a light laugh. “I know Bertolts, Annie, Armin, Jean, and Eren but I can’t seem to grasp yours at the moment.” His face goes a bit red and he looks annoyed, then he snaps out of it quickly.

“Reiner, you may want to remember it. You’ll be using it a lot.” He says with a wink.

“Yeah, probably preceded by the words ‘that dumbass’.” You reply. “I’m (Name). Now, honestly why are you at my table? No one comes over here.”

“I like the view.” His reply is swift and he stares across at you. You roll your eyes.

“R-Reiner maybe we should leave her alone?” Bertolt says quietly.

“No you can stay.” You grab Bertolt’s hand gently causing him to stop his motion from the seat. Reiner just glares a moment. “I’ll even allow the boar to stay if you like.” You say. You release his hand as he chooses not to get up.

“I see.” Reiner says quietly. You can’t help but chuckle a bit at this. In fact, it is rather amusing. You really did prefer the quiet. Reiner was loud and obnoxious.

Observing Bertolt you admired his quiet resolve and simple taciturn. He didn’t speak or make himself known unless it was necessary. This was lovely to you.

You sit a while in silence, just enjoying the company of your two companions. Somehow, you had forgotten it was nice to not be alone all of the time. You really didn’t care for speaking unless you had to, which made your abilities rather ironic. The only exception to that rule is people you are close with.

When you do get up, you notice Reiner and Bertolt still seated. Figuring you should be polite; you excuse yourself and offer to take their empty plates along with you. They nod and start talking to each other in a soft, low murmur. Quietly you wander to the kitchen, placing the plates for the current cadet team to clean.

As the months pass, you spend more and more time with Reiner and Bertolt, which eventually brought Annie joining your group. She’s quiet and doesn’t seem to care for you one way or another, something you find refreshing.

Across your years of training it was one particular conversation that brought your group quite a bit closer. Despite the seeming innocence, for those of you from outside the walls it was very significant. The four of you were sitting outside at the edge of the forest, having earned a bit of free time due to the illness of several of your superiors.

“Do you ever get homesick?” Really the question was completely unexpected, especially from you. It wasn't that you were emotionless, you just didn’t care to waste breath on such things normally. However, it was your little brother’s birthday and you wouldn't be there to see him.

Reiner and Bertolt were both quiet a moment and the silence was broken by Annie.

“It doesn’t matter. Eventually I’ll go back. For now I have things to do.” She said in her usual cold tone.

“Sometimes I do.” Bertolt offered quietly. You smiled softly at him. Yes when he’s quiet like this it is somehow adorable to you.

“It’s pointless. What made you ask that?” Reiner looked at you with a puzzled expression. He still takes time now and then to hit on you, but you made it clear to him, your interest is elsewhere. Even though that person hasn't figured it out yet.

“It’s my little brother’s birthday.” You say with a sigh. “Anyone else would send a letter, a card. He won’t hear a thing from me. It’s not the first time… It’s been that way since the fall of the wall.” Your voice was actually pretty quiet. Your companions grew quiet as well. Either unused to your emotional side, or uncertain due to their own past, you weren't sure which. Oh you knew what they were. Your abilities had told you when you first met.

“I’m sorry.” Bertolt said quietly. He didn’t say anything else. He didn’t need to you could see the guilt written in the depths of his eyes. You touch his hand lightly to comfort him.

“Don’t be.” There wasn't much more to say, really. Nothing practical. “Honestly it isn’t bad, it’s just my homeland is so far away.” The phrase and wording you used was an accident. You always called it your town in front of others. Here though, with just the four of you, it seemed to slip out.

“Homeland?” It was a quiet question, one no one really wanted to answer. That moment though the realization hit that you might all have one very large secret in common, your backgrounds.

“Oddly, except around you four that always comes out ‘home town, or my village’. What have you done to me?” Trying to make light of a situation doesn’t really suit you and they notice your increased nervousness rather quickly. You lean back quietly against the tree.

“So you’re from where exactly?” Bertolt asks you. Weird, to be questioned by one of your own kind, then again, you are from separate villages.

“The north village… near the frost zone” Your words are quiet but they send a soft hum through the group. They heard of the north village, warriors, every single one of them.

They know what this means, too. It means you are a shifter like they are. The silent acknowledgement passes through the group. Now they understand your reluctance to form friendships with the rest of the trainees.

“It wouldn’t hurt to allow a loose attachment now and then, (name).” Reiner said. “Plus, some of these people are pretty decent.”

You roll your eyes a moment, but find yourself smiling softly. “I might have allowed a few attachments, just not intentional ones… especially with them…” Your words were nearly a whisper; really your thoughts had escaped your lips.

Unintentionally, they reached the ears of Bertolt, who had across the past months very easily become your biggest crush, not that you were hiding it in any way. At the moment he was laying on the grass next to that same tree.

“Can I ask who?” He says. Still pretty bold for him for the first time in a while he didn’t stutter at a direct question. You find yourself smiling.

“All of you… but most of all one of you.” Your smirk couldn't hide the fact you were gazing at him, but lying on the grass with his eyes fixed on the tree above, he didn’t see that.

“Oh.” His voice seemed sad and you watched him quietly. He honestly thought you meant Reiner, after all you two had been spending quite a bit of time together lately. What he didn’t know is that time was spent talking about him. Still, finding out you were all from outside the walls somehow forged a bond none of you wanted to break.

~~~~ Timeskip to after graduation ~~~~

Somehow you never managed to tell him how you felt, and it pained you to think that. However, after that conversation you made a serious effort to see him as often as possible. After a while, though he started avoiding you. Now that you were close to choosing your divisions, the thought of the distance was making your heart ache.

The other trainees were up on top of the walls. You’d been stationed in the interior, guarding a set of doors that worked as service gates. They were much too small for titans, but a human could easily fit through them.

You’d been there about twenty minutes when you noticed someone trying to do exactly that. He was incredibly tall and incredibly familiar. Especially since you had spent the entire of training trying to get the courage to say how you felt. It’s ironic how forward you were with anyone but him.

He tried to move the door but it wouldn't budge. He seemed to be thinking a moment, of course it’s locked. He tries picking it, with no luck and you watch him pull back his leg to kick it.

“Come on now, what did that door do to you?” You ask with a sweet tone to your voice. He turned around suddenly looking startled and a little ashamed, till he realized it was you. He takes a deep breath.

“(Name) Don’t sneak up on me.” You can tell that he’s anxious, he’s sweating terribly. He clenched his hands tightly. “Uh.. I’m really busy so…”

“I see, you’re busy molesting the door I’m watching… but I was distracted.” You stand a little closer to him. “Bertl, what’s going on? You’re so nervous.” Your hands reach out and grab his sweaty ones, trying to just get him to calm down a moment.

“I-I… Uh I need to get something… that’s all…” He looked sad. “I-I didn’t know you were on g-guard tonight I…” He was definitely upset.

“Yeah. I didn’t want to be here. I was hoping they’d place me on the inner wall. Something feels weird today.” You looked at him again, noting the sadness in his eyes.

“I-I don’t want you to stay here… p-please, just go somewhere safe…” His eyes are pleading with you. You reach up, gently taking his cheek in your hand… You close your eyes a second and see a soft flash of steam.

You see the colossal titan, standing with his hands on the wall, his leg drawn back to kick in the door. The movement was slow, deliberate. Then you see the gate and part of Wall maria door shooting inwards, bits flying into Shiganshina. Then you see the gate to Trost fly inward, and your own broken body on the ground… and you feel… like your heart is breaking. You felt and heard him? Normally you don’t feel, only see... You open your eyes, seeing him staring at you in confusion. You giggle slightly.

You start to pull your hand away and he puts his big hand over the top of it. He presses your hand tightly against his cheek and closes his eyes. You find yourself smiling.

“P-please… I w-want you safe…” He says again. “I-I.. I really like you. I d-don’t want you hurt…” He whispers the last part, but you hear it all the same.

“Bertl…” Your soft words are almost whispered. “Can you come down here a minute?” Your voice is much more confident than you are. He bends down a bit, bringing his face closer to yours. “Bertl… I…” Your words were cut off by his lips on yours.

He tried to get back up, blushing but you threw your arms around his neck before he could do so. He stayed leaning over a little and smiled awkwardly at you.

“I-I’m sorry… I just didn’t know if I’d get another chance.” His voice wasn't as shaky as normal though. He seemed to be enjoying the fact you were holding him.

“I love you.” You say softly. “So I’ll give you that chance now, if you want to take it.” You didn’t have to offer twice.

He pulls you into a tighter kiss, dragging your feet off the floor. The sudden lack of footing forces your legs to find something else to cling onto and you wrap your legs tightly around his waist.

You can feel his smile pressing against your lips as he presses you back into the wall, pushing himself against your lips harder. He sets his hands on your hips and pulls you up higher. He breaks the kiss a moment, staring at you.

“I love you, (Name).” His tone takes on a husky note as his hands slide along the sides of your body exploring it gently. He kisses you again. This time though his lips part slightly, begging for yours to do the same. The heat of his body increases and you feel him pressing further against you as your mouth opens to grant him access.

A warm, wet tongue flickers against yours, brushing it sweetly but hungrily. Your fingers rush upwards tangling in his hair and pulling his head down to force him even closer to you. You feel yourself moaning into his mouth, causing him to press even harder up against you. A burning fire through your lower belly takes you, a new, strangely pleasant sensation as his tongue courses across yours again.

Oxygen had become scarce though, and the lack of that drew you apart. He rested his forehead on yours, pressing his lips against yours lightly between panted breaths. He held you closely staying like this a minute more, before he lowered you to the ground. He backed away a bit, still not wanting to leave you.

“I’m sorry… I have to go.” He says, with a heavy sadness in his voice. You hate to leave him, you know exactly what his plan is but your mind is quick and you set it to work.

“Bertolt.” You say softly. “It’s okay. Let me give you the key and then give me a few minutes. I’ll be gone and you can do whatever you need to do, alright?”

He nods quietly and says nothing, just pulls you into a tight hug and holds you a while longer.

“Bertolt… Come find me after this all settles okay?” You touch his cheek lightly, wanting to draw him in again, but you resist. He’s probably already behind schedule.

“I-I’d like that, but why? Why get into trouble for me?” He asks with another worried expression.

“My boyfriend is worth getting into trouble over.” You say with a wink. “Give me five minutes, and go take care of business.” You grin. “I love you Bertolt.”

He smiles softly “I love you, (Name)… more than anything.” He gives you a quick, chaste kiss and watches as you take off at a dead run from the area. All he can do now, is pray the monsters he is about to unleash don’t harm you. He’s determined though, he will find you again.

As your run takes you through the empty corridors of the walls you think quietly to yourself. I'm glad I let myself get attached.