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m32 — Exangela
Published: 2004-12-01 17:49:09 +0000 UTC; Views: 87; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 5
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Description
Angelic feathers, now folded –Worn and faded, achromatic gray –
High upon the dusty shelf.
Crushed between the tomes.
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Comments: 7
It amazes me how powerful such a short peice is, i like very muchly, i can see the effort you have put into this, it's shows through the quality.
I too would like to see another stanza, i'd like to see where you go with this.
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Thanks. This one has a lot higher time/word ratio then most my other poems, so that prolly explains the more powerful effect.
Jeez, three people have asked me to expand... I guess I'll have to oblige.
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i think that you use some great imagery within this, and i think that you shouldn't increase the length if you think it will spoil it, but i do think one more verse thing would be good!
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Nice wording, I'd like to see more of this one, its very interesting, it can go deeper, but even like this it works very nicely.
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Thanks.
I tried to keep this one short on purpose though. Most of my poems are longer and it has been repeatedly noted that I tend to be wordy (in essays more so then poems, but poems also), so I thought I'd try to pack as much poem into as few words as I could with this one.
If I ever get enough time/encouragement I might rework this into a longer piece, but for now I'll keep it short. Thanks again for the comment.
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