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MichaelCleaves β WRB, issue 2, p. 10
Published: 2011-06-09 21:50:55 +0000 UTC; Views: 310; Favourites: 5; Downloads: 6
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WRB issue 2, page 10 ("Caracalla, a Tragedy," act one, scene two, page 4). There's one more page from this scene, but I'm behind schedule...Related content
Comments: 11
Thanks a lot!
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Gorgeous pages, Michael - there's a harmonious balance of black and white, even in the thumbs. The dialogue sounds authentically archaic, but I'm not having a problem following it . . .
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It's archaic, but I thought I should make it readably so. Originally I had some lines that were straight out of Marlowe, but I changed it a lot because it sounded forced. I'm still not happy with a lot of it, but it's the first time I've ever tried to write something like this, so I forgive myself.
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I'm having problems understanding all the english (and I quote Jelena here with a "my fault completely"), but I love the growing sense of pathos, and this particular page is really beautiful, with the flowy panels that end with a quietly menacing/foreboding one.
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Well, I'm glad you liked them... there's going to be a lot more menacing to come!
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I needed some time to go through your new pages, they look great! Aside I probably couldn't understand every word (my fault completely), I like the visual complement, much effort put there, very deliberately done, with faces, shadows and reflections. The fact there are two of the characters, makes the reflecting, overlapping and the whole hidden-unhidden thing most interesting to watch.
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Thanks, Jelena! I'm not sure about the poetry on this page, though. It may not be your "fault" (as if knowing as much English as you do when I don't know any Serbian is a fault...) - I really wasn't as happy with the lines on this. When I was typing them, they sounded really clunky, and had a lot of unrelated statements (esp. from Septimius). It didn't help that I've been re-reading all of the English plays on which my knowledge is based... they're so much better in so many ways...
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the sequence and the deisgn of the page is so awesome
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youΒ΄re welcome michael
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