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MoonlitWhisper — Fool of Pride
Published: 2008-09-30 01:52:56 +0000 UTC; Views: 308; Favourites: 8; Downloads: 8
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Description Fool of Pride, fool of pride
I am a fool of pride
Grotesque I lived by pride alone
Pride over my word and will of stone
But look at me now
Down on my knees
My stone is crumbling and I've nowhere to go.
The land I walked is gone 'neath my feet
But by my pride I do not fall
Though all the world is crashing 'round me.
Fool of Pride, fool of pride
I am a fool of pride
Nothing have I but iron hubris
Damn it all, I wish it would fall
So I can move and make my way through this.
I struggle and fight but no end is in sight
Torn in twos, and threes, and fours
Do I say yes, do I say no, do I say nothing,
               Nothing at all
For fear of loss I would will to speak, but yea or nay
               The choice makes me weak.
For fear of loss I would will for pride and deny it all
               But by and by it would make my fall.
Fool of Pride, damned with pride
I am a victim of pride.
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Comments: 14

TwistedTree [2008-10-03 19:35:35 +0000 UTC]

Nice I liked the rythm and the irregular rhyme.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

MoonlitWhisper In reply to TwistedTree [2008-10-04 20:17:08 +0000 UTC]

Thanks!

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juvawee [2008-09-30 21:45:51 +0000 UTC]

I'm absolutely speechless!!??

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MoonlitWhisper In reply to juvawee [2008-10-04 20:17:41 +0000 UTC]

is that a good thing or a bad thing?

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relhom [2008-09-30 16:50:15 +0000 UTC]

Nice touch!

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MoonlitWhisper In reply to relhom [2008-10-04 20:20:18 +0000 UTC]

Thanks!

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arina-kaji-GOF [2008-09-30 03:36:51 +0000 UTC]

wow nifty! i like it!

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MoonlitWhisper In reply to arina-kaji-GOF [2008-10-04 20:21:04 +0000 UTC]

Danke! ^^

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arina-kaji-GOF In reply to MoonlitWhisper [2008-10-06 05:26:29 +0000 UTC]

youre welcome^^

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MoonlitWhisper In reply to arina-kaji-GOF [2008-10-06 22:20:16 +0000 UTC]

^^ Have you read Turning Point yet? Just outta curiosity. ^^

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arina-kaji-GOF In reply to MoonlitWhisper [2008-10-07 02:47:37 +0000 UTC]

that your story you put on here? no.. iely read short stories as i am usually ina hurry when i get on here but if you want i cna try to find a spare moment

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MoonlitWhisper In reply to arina-kaji-GOF [2008-10-10 01:54:21 +0000 UTC]

yeah. I was surprised when I saw how long it turned out. lol. If you can find a spare moment, I would be extremely pleased to have you review it. But you don't have to. ^^

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TheMadSpaniard [2008-09-30 02:22:45 +0000 UTC]

This piece is wonderful. I really feel it's meaning and I know where it comes from. Well done dear.

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MoonlitWhisper In reply to TheMadSpaniard [2008-10-04 20:21:56 +0000 UTC]

Thank you. I'm glad that you enjoyed it.

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