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Published: 2009-07-12 23:50:44 +0000 UTC; Views: 419; Favourites: 4; Downloads: 6
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“I wish that the Goblin King would come and speak with me. Right now.”Sarah held herself strictly poised, back ramrod straight, until she heard the wind outside pick up, shrieking suddenly at a disturbance no mortal senses could detect. When the crack of thunder doused the lights, leaving the room illuminated only by the intermittent flashes of lightning, she took a deep, careful breath.
In the next instant, her knees buckled beneath her and she dropped onto the couch, letting her head fall against the backrest. When the dark, imposing figure stepped into her living room, she merely tilted her head and gazed at him, examining him for the first time in over a decade.
Still tall and lean, he had eschewed his armor in favor of tight black leggings and an open-necked, black poet’s shirt held almost closed with a black vest. His knee-high, high-heeled boots were, she was unsurprised to see, also black.
It seemed to be a theme with him. Was he in mourning?
Her eyes traveled wistfully back up the length of his body, noting the carefully rigid stance that he held himself in, the way he had cocked one hip slightly in a show of arrogance. She almost smiled at the familiar gesture, as though she had seen it every day of her life.
When she reached his face, though, his cold eyes pierced hers, and she lost herself in them unintentionally, unable to look away.
“Jareth.”
The name slipped from between slightly parted lips, half prayer, half heartfelt plea.
He blinked once, slowly, and took three leisurely strides to the edge of the couch, standing over her with his cold, untouchable mask still lowered over his features. “Yes?” he asked quietly, his voice inflectionless.
She reached up and slowly threaded her fingers through his, never breaking her gaze from his. He could have pulled away, could easily have shaken her off and disappeared, but for some reason, he let her tug on his arm until he settled onto the wide couch across from her.
“I need to know something, Jareth,” she whispered, almost too softly to be audible. Her fingers were still laced through his, the pads of her fingers tracing aimless patterns on the leather gloves. He silently raised an eyebrow, and a faint pink glow rose in her cheeks.
“I...I need to know...” She seemed to quail at the thought of confessing her insecurities to his silent, brooding monarch, and her eyes had already dropped to their entwined hands. After a long moment, she rose silently and walked to the fireplace, where she took something from a small box on the mantelpiece.
When she sat back down, she gazed at her closed fist, then took a deep, shaky breath and lifted the small object between pinched forefinger and thumb.
“Do you know what this is?”
It was small and delicate, beautiful in its fragile way; a slender gold band in which nestled a clear, shining gemstone.
His expression, carefully neutral and detached until then, slipped enough for her to see the black rage and naked possessiveness that now darkened his eyes.
“He left yesterday for two weeks,” Sarah told him quickly, forestalling anything that he might say or do, “and I told him that I would give him an answer when he returned.”
She lifted her eyes from the small ring and gazed deep into his eyes, not bothering to cover her emotions. “There are thirteen days before I must decide my path...forever.” She closed her eyes and took a third shaky breath. When she opened her eyes, she spoke the words that she had meant, and failed, to speak earlier.
“I need to know if there is—if there could be—anything between us.”
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Comments: 14
tae- [2010-02-12 18:56:07 +0000 UTC]
And he said "YOU SHALL BE MINE!" and thusly took her out to Starbucks for coffee and muffins
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scriptor-scriptorum In reply to tae- [2010-02-12 19:40:38 +0000 UTC]
*laughs* Nice try, but... I doubt that'll happen. Though I do need to get back to writing. I'm terribly behind.
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scriptor-scriptorum [2009-08-04 23:33:40 +0000 UTC]
He he...the "bad (fan)fiction" is actually how I was inspired to write about Repo. I could just see how it could be so good...but wasn't.
So now I'm working on that. Eh.
About beta readers - yes, I have one. Her name is approachthebottle on dA and Landlord's Daughter on FanFiction. (She goes by Alex, though.) We're both VERY strongly opinionated...which is good in some ways, because it forces me to recognize view points other than my own, but can also be very frustrating, since neither of us are willing to back down.
So...advice.
a) Pick someone you know or get to know the person before choosing him/her.
b) Pick someone whom you respect as a writer AND a person - if you don't like him/her, thing's'll only go from bad to worse.
c) Make sure that his/her writing style is similar to yours. If you write a lot of weighty, intellectual pieces (like Meum Regem Nescio), don't choose someone who specializes in crackfic (or humor in general). The same works in reverse. (I, for example, write a mix...I have a whole collection of light, fun pieces on FF, but this and my Repo piece are a lot more serious.)
d) Consider getting multiple betas. A second opinion is great...but it's still only what ONE person thinks. Having three or four people to talk to gives you a range of opinions, so you don't get stuck thinking "is this bit really that bad?" (More perspective = GOOD.)
*tries to think of something else and fails* (If I remember later, I'll add to it.) Is that helpful?
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OpenLocks In reply to scriptor-scriptorum [2009-08-10 02:21:09 +0000 UTC]
I take it you don't think the random search-and-hope-for-the-best is the best idea for finding a good beta then.
Ehh, I dunno. But then, I think I'll have a good bit of time before the story gets finished, so plenty of time to think on it!
Thanks a lot for that advice!! It's very helpful
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scriptor-scriptorum In reply to OpenLocks [2009-08-10 06:04:01 +0000 UTC]
A random search CAN be helpful, because it might turn up someone whom you wouldn't have seen otherwise...but just picking someone without knowing who they are, how they think, or how they write can end badly very easily.
*shrugs* You can wait, but finding someone earlier can also be helpful - for example, they can tell you if a particular plotline is overused or seems unrealistic, and they can also suggest new ideas that you might not have thought of. (Thank you, Alex, for the thought about Jareth giving Sarah dance lessons.)
*grins and thumbs up* You're welcome! I try to be helpful...even if I don't always succeed. (After all, I don't know everything, and some of what I know doesn't work for other people. Grain of salt, you know?)
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OpenLocks In reply to scriptor-scriptorum [2009-08-11 05:03:35 +0000 UTC]
Jareth giving Sarah dance lessons... ? 0.0
Why do I have a feeling that there is a very interesting story coming up? Or did I miss something... *googly eyes*
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scriptor-scriptorum In reply to OpenLocks [2009-08-12 02:58:28 +0000 UTC]
You've read "Patience Is Not A Virtue", right? An idea for farther down the road in that.
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OpenLocks In reply to scriptor-scriptorum [2009-08-12 23:59:00 +0000 UTC]
C'mon with that story, already!!
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scriptor-scriptorum In reply to OpenLocks [2009-08-13 02:27:40 +0000 UTC]
You know, I was working on it last night...it's going to be two scenes (ish), and I'm part way through the first.
BUT I'm insanely busy this weekend--driving across the state tomorrow to visit my brother for something Friday, then back Friday night to move into college Saturday morning. And I haven't really started packing for EITHER.
So be patient.
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OpenLocks In reply to scriptor-scriptorum [2009-08-14 05:20:00 +0000 UTC]
But patience isn't a virtue!! Don't worry, you can have whatever time you wish. But at the end of it all, I wanna read the results!
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OpenLocks [2009-07-31 05:06:45 +0000 UTC]
I'm not complaining - I like it when authors concentrate on actually developing a plot *rolls eyes*
And this looks ve-ery interesting *aquiver with anticipation* X3
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scriptor-scriptorum In reply to OpenLocks [2009-08-02 03:48:27 +0000 UTC]
Yes, well...the irritating thing about this story is that Jareth and Sarah are remaining infuriatingly tight-lipped about its future.
Actually, they've BOTH been pretty quiet the last couple of weeks...bloody writers' block. *grumpy author*
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OpenLocks In reply to scriptor-scriptorum [2009-08-04 02:10:07 +0000 UTC]
Darn you, sophomores!
Maybe you could watch the movie again or read a comic/story that's especially funny. They're some things I've found helpful.
Actually, it's kinda random, but I find reading semi-badly written fanfiction very inspiring! I think it's because I can see a promising story, but this bit was completely out of character, and this part was boring, and this paragraph was just over the top! So it makes me think, if I'd written this, what would have happened if I did this?...
Goodness knows badly written fanfiction isn't hard to find...
Ooh, that's uncharitable!
I'm not exactly struggling from writer's block, but (as always) from dedication block! I'm wondering whether if I search for a beta reader, whether they'd be any good at inspiring me to write more, but I dunno. Have you had any experience with beta readers? I'm a chapter or so into a light little piece (as light as an author who cannot write humour can make it XD) called "Arabian Nights". Annoyed, because it's a decent plot, what I have of it, but I'm not very good at getting plot to turn out!
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scriptor-scriptorum In reply to OpenLocks [2009-08-04 23:34:32 +0000 UTC]
Drat. I commented on my story instead of on your comment. Come read it anyway?
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