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Dragon-nip — Frozen Soul
Published: 2006-12-11 07:57:10 +0000 UTC; Views: 528; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 5
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Description
frozen soul...I'm lying on the floor of a grotto...wakening...
...everything is chilly and stern around me...
...the air is heavy...
It's so funereal.
I can lubberly stagger to my feet
...fumbling my way out of here
a sharp rock scrapes my flesh
I flounder through the narrow passage into deeper silence
I catch sight of a lake encompassed with reed plot
try to struggle closer to it
I'm leaning warily above its mirror,
rather startled to find, looking deeply into it
I can't see myself...
...but who else could be here?
...a Feline visage stares back...
...Am I dreaming?
No. This is real, I'm still awake...
in a dream wounds don't ache.
I'm terrified; slowly crawling further back...
lifting up my eyes to the welkin and weeping
"I just wanted someone who cares for me,
didn't want more, I've told you!
Why did you get rid of me?
Have I done something against you?"
I can now realize
I've become what I've always wanted to be
except being derelict as a pet, I...
...I'll be over there...soon...I will...
Just sitting there without moving
start to feel cold...oh, this icy wind
from the sky something is falling
snow...frost touches my bluish skin
by now my whiskers are frosty
I can't feel my paws...nor the freezing air
just sitting on the spot stiffly
at last sleeping the sleep of the goner.
© Dragon-nip
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Comments: 38
I faved it. Thank you for mentioning me. And your English is improving *thumbs up*
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Thank you for the comment ^^ and that was the minimum I mentioned my helpers!!! 
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Yay! Your poem's 'purr-fect' now. ^^
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Thank you both for your comments and help! 
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I think you did some grammar faults in this one,but it's actually very good
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Lol, and would you point out them? And thanks!
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i m not so sure,but whan you say "wakening",do you mean "waking up"...The rest are words i searched on the convertisser and didn't found...
But my english is too bad to reprosh anything
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Yeah, exactly the 'moment' of the waking, like it would happen slowly, hardly. My englyish isn't the best one too, but trying to correct it
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Well I csn see words thast lose the rythum of the story and theres a fe that I honestly dont know if your using them right. But over all I still like it and what it says. But awoke should be Awake I believe. also instead of saying Reed Plot you could just say Reeds Also later you say that "A feline visage regard back. You could say A feline visage regards me back, or you might say I found myself staring into the eyes of a Feline, or you can shorten and say A Feline visage stares back at me. But you get the point.
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Many thanks for your opinion, I still can't thank you enough!
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well thank you so much I am deeply honored
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By heart! I go to see your inventory...pardon, gallery!
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You are most welcome for the help revising your poem.
It's even better then it was before. I really love how you describe your feelings in such poetic words.
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Oh, thank you! Your e-mail to your love was fine for me too 
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Really a damn good poem. The spelling errors make it hard at first and spelling is important when you are trying to get a point across. But good job once you get past that it is damn good
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well, I have finished the corrections, I will upload on Friday if everything goes fine! maybe you will read it...at leat the comment! I mention you too in that! and thank you! damn good? well....i didn't expect...hehe
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Ok I will ass soon as I am able
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Thank you very much for your time! I will await it - verrry much.
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When I'm in this kind of a mood I like to listen "I'm a rock" by Simon&Garfunkell - it usually helps me...
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hmmm...I've never hard that name...but the title sounds good.
I can't escape from this mood -I reckon- until I fount an owner to myself...
every Cat wants an owner - or more!
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Common opinion is that cat's don't need anybody... I hate common opinions ussually they are erroneous 
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Course - every animal needs if that lies in it's character
You are right, so You are not suprised I think when I think the same as You do in this matter
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So you think i'm right: Cats need a stroking hand!
I feel I need, so they need too! And you know well: as I can remember you were the person here who brings home the Cats and then find someone who can love&feed them! Am I right?
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Do you mind if I point out grammatical and spelling problems? It's a good poem, it really is- but it'd be better if the problems were fixed up.
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ok, I'm listening, it was so late when I wrote, and I'm not english born...
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ohhh 
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aw, you are so kind! thank you!
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