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Izuma — EFN round 2 part 1
Published: 2009-05-07 05:43:37 +0000 UTC; Views: 6383; Favourites: 76; Downloads: 165
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Woooo going to post this now~Mr. I (c)
Roz (c) moi
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Comments: 43
dang, now i must go back to try to figure out what was it they were thinking about...
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Roz is such a sweet lady (when she's not being confused and homicidal). But Mr Inverted is a BISHIE. 
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OH DEARY ME.
MR. INVERTED IS SO ADORABLE IN YOUR STYLE.
I wish you the best of luck.
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Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwsoooooooooooooooooommmmmmmeeeeeeeee.......
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Jesus CHRIST Roz Is a psycho.
Shes so emotionally unstable, and you do a really good job of capturing that in your comics izu.
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I do enjoy the effects such as bringing color to Roz's sister when she makes an appearance and the mood you set up, but your entry was a little hard to understand in some places.
For scenes such as when Roz runs into Mr. I when he is coming out of the portal, I think maybe some speedlines or sound effects would have made it easier to tell what had happened. Also, the transition of when Mr. I is looking from Roz to his wound is a little confusing since it was hard for me to tell what exactly he was looking at in the next panel. And I found it a little strange where Roz had landed after Mr. I had tripped her.
I'm sorry, these places were just a little confusing to me, but your artwork and coloring is lovely~
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|D Not a problem! If there's something I can do to improve it next time, then feel free to tell me all you can! Thank you for your insight and I'll put it towards improving my next comic (provided I win this round.)
-hugggles- thank you!
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Sorry, I hope I wasn't douche-y when I nitpicked at places in your comic, but you really do color wonderfully and the place that you do have your speedlines and such works well to portray, very clearly, what is happening.
Thank you for reading my comment and considering applying my insight into your future comics (especially since I was lame and double posted, I'm so sorry) and I wish you the best of luck in your second round!
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|D No no! You weren't douchey! They were honest to goodness critiques and I welcome them. |D. I unfortunately don't know how to do speedlines very well (I never really had to use them before this) so I'll keep learning! |D.
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Oh, I'm glad. Thank you for taking my critique so well, I'm actually not very good at it, but I hope it does help you out a little. And I think the places you do use speedlines, you do it well. Especially in your second page, I think they really help move the story along and gives it a nice pacing.
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FFFFF I'M SO SORRY I DOUBLE POSTED
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I do enjoy the effects such as bringing color to Roz's sister when she makes an appearance and the mood you set up, but your entry was a little hard to understand in some places.
For scenes such as when Roz runs into Mr. I when he is coming out of the portal, I think maybe some speedlines or sound effects would have made it easier to tell what had happened. Also, the transition of when Mr. I is looking from Roz to his wound is a little confusing since it was hard for me to tell what exactly he was looking at in the next panel. And I found it a little strange where Roz had landed after Mr. I had tripped her.
I'm sorry, these places were just a little confusing to me, but your artwork and coloring is lovely~
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I would suggest working alot on pacing
Most of the time, the way the sequences are timed and portrayed doesn't let me understand anything.
I had to take a double take in the scene between Rita leaving and Mr.I sprawled on the floor dead.
The pacing actually might do better if you don't put multiple word bubbles in one panel, like you did in some.
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Roz's Psycho expressions make me happy in the inside
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Unestable Roz scares me, a lot ;w;
I love how you drew MrI... so sexy x3
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Gah... I love the psychological warfare approach to these matches. If Roz wasn't so unstable, you'd really... actually, it's because of her instability that I find her so endearing, methinks. Poor girl... ;~;
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Awww Roz. Yeah, she's so unstable but I have a small inkling as to why she's so unstable. |D.
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I wanna hug her and make her feel better... ;3;
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Oooh man. With what I've got planned for her, nothing's going to make it better.
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Dun dun DUUUUUN 
your drawing style is amazing Izuma. *in total awe* perhaps there could have been a but more light to it but since my policy is he darker the better im not complaining 
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Damn I love the way you draw Roz's emotions
they're so extreme yet you can tell that she's going through a lot
uhm yeah -shuts up now and continues to read-
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This is lovely, your Mr. I looks stunning.
My only complaint would be that you place a few of the speech bubbles quite confusingly. Try to visualise how the viewer's eye is going to navigate through the panel layout before throwing down the balloons.
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damn roz is scary when she gets all confused
but I still love her great page.
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