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learntoswim — Desperate and Weary
Published: 2004-04-09 19:29:28 +0000 UTC; Views: 66; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 7
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Description
And as I lie desperate and weary,My hopes and dreams of a new beginning
casting shadows upon my face,
blinding me from the guidance of the stars,
A realization grabs me unexpectadly
from the depths of what remains of my soul:
Darkness has overcome me,
Forever calling from within,
there never was a light to guide me;
Not even one so dim.
Hush little child,
and go back to sleep--
It will be all over soon,
There is no need to weep.
This numbness is familiar to me.
It is the refuge to which I seek.
Yet I have had enough of writing on tear-stained paper;
Shimmering pearls of emotion
Streaming from my eyes.
It has to end now.
I am sick and tired of the disguise.
Still I am nothing more than what you see before you.
There is nothing there inside.
So you mustn't worry now because some day your dreams will come true.
The darkness has overcome me,
But tomorrow the sun will rise for you.
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Comments: 4
just emotion can some times be enough for a poem,for me a poem is still something to express the things i can't just say in. If the poem has meaning and passion behind it it will nearly always be good, just like this one
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thank you, that set me at ease . . . but i cant help by feel that this poem was a step down in my natural progression that is very plain to see in the poems that i have dated--the order in which i submitted them is by all means not in the order ive written them . . . i wrote desperate and weary in between when i wrote Your Name and My Reflection/Recollection . . . i encourage you to view these and many others . . . thank you for your support . . .
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hehe, i prefer reading poems that are quite like my own style, short and simple, i'm not really much for long poems. hell, i'm not even much for poems :s
so far i've never tried to write one, i always get some inspiration which i feel would be a shame to not write down :s
but this one was worth the read, as long as the idea and emotion is there the poem is at least half way there
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Good job. It could use some revising, but that will come in time. I will not give any advice on that, because this poem reminds me of some of my own, wrote out of pure emotion. You will probably not want to do any revising right away. At any rate, you have got a good piece going here, keep it up.
GDB
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