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namenotrequired — For a better 2018, final part
Published: 2018-01-01 12:32:58 +0000 UTC; Views: 2455; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 0
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So far, I have decided that I'm going to change , then what I'm going to change and why I'm going to change those things. The last question: how?
Ideally each of these would be a skill or habit that I train until it's natural and mostly effortless.
I can only sketch the initial attempt at improving these things. With time I'll learn if they work or not and change the method. I'll reflect in a month.
I
For overeating, the first step could be to decide how much I'll eat before I start eating. Ellen and I often cook more than we need to leave some for lunch. I could separate this in advance and leave only the amount I intend to eat, before I eat.
II
Right now I have a daily alarm for 22:30 to tell me to go to bed, which I ignore too often. I'm also planning my days, which helps during the day but evenings tend to be more social and unpredictable. But I suppose the biggest problem is that when I go to bed, I sometimes still spend too much time on my phone.
So now I set an alarm for 22:45 and every 15 mins after, until I turn off my phone. Let's see if that helps.
III
The social one is complex, but I could use both confidence and habit. For more confidence, I hope to start practicing martial arts (and keep exercising). I'll feel more dangerous, in a good way. To get more into the habit of approaching people I'll go out to talk to strangers every week. And every time I'll decide in advance how I'm going to challenge myself that time.
This week, it'll be a visit to the consulate on Thursday. I'll prepare this tomorrow before lunch.
IV
To follow my conscience, I should allow myself to go against it as little as possible. When my conscience says something, I should always at least stop doing what I'm doing for a second and give myself time to consider doing what it says.
V
As for knowing what to do... I have many things I want to achieve and do and improve and experiment, but little sense of priority. I'll reflect (a bit like this) every month about what I'd like to achieve the next month, and how. For this month, this brief journal series will do.
Happy new year!
That's a lot of things.
Do any of you have plans to be better, and how?
Part 3 | Two months in
Skin by Dan Leveille
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Comments: 10
Now that we've gone past the middle of the year, it would be interesting to know how you're doing with all of these.
It's a lot of things you've written down, and life has a way of surprising us with new things too. It's full of ups and downs for sure.
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Martial arts would be cool! Do you have a specific one in mind?
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I've taken some experimental classes in Taekwondo and liked it. I just gotta find a school I for my budget. If there's none that teaches Taekwondo I'll try some other martial arts.
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Brazil tend to do pretty well in various martial arts at an international level so I would imagine that you should find taekwondo classes. I've always wanted to learn some form of martial arts but 1. the fact that other people touch you and 2. the fact that in most of them people see your feet - I have a problem with these two things. It's stupid, I know.
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We all have our quirks. 
What made you interested in martial arts?
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It seems badass, of course. Also, being a girl, one inevitably acquires instances of being hit or groped where one appreciates that some degree of self defence would be cool.
Nowadays it is about 75% because Mahiro Takano is badass. :')
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I'm not particularly weak either given that I was taller than the man who groped me, for example. But I always feel vulnerable. The first thing I think when I step into a street is "is this safe" and the first thing when another human being is in the same street is "how do I get out". Studies show that most women feel like that in public and most men feel as you do.
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I have noticed it. Like a few days ago I was walking through heavy rain with a big umbrella and a woman walked past without one and I spontaneously offered her to walk under the umbrella with me. She refused. She didn't look like she was enjoying the rain either, and I think anyone who wasn't scared would have accepted. I was surprised. Her refusal was so immediate and resolute, as if she had expected it and decided to decline before I had even decided to offer. If I were a woman, or somehow known I wasn't interested in touching her, I'm guessing she may have happily accepted.
The main difference between now and the other time I did that, and the girl accepted, was that that was in a busy street, and now it was empty. (Well, and the girl was carrying some cardboard boxes.)
Which is all just to say... yes, for women martial arts or at least some form of self defense seems at least as useful as for men.
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Yeah I would never go under a man's umbrella, but that's my added distrust as a person of colour who looks muslim in a nation which has its fair share of racists/xenophobes/islamophobes. (Some of it nowadays is also my desire to avoid talking to people, I just don't know what to say and feel like a huge weirdo.) If it was a woman I might have considered. Depending on what the woman looks like. Does she look genuine or... I don't know.
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